Loki Laufeyson - Saviour {2}

Chapter Fifty Nine - He Should be Awake

A chill drifted down my spine as I slowly stepped into the Lab. It always happened when I started at the clean white walls and I hated the nausious churning feel it created in my stomach. My chest tightened slightly, but I didn't let it overwhelm me as I focused on putting one foot in front of the other as I stared at Bruce's back, Bucky's footsteps echoing behind me.

Bruce keyed in a code to the door and it swung open with a beep, the action too familiar and sending another chill through me that threatened to turn my legs to lead. Taking a deep breath, I reminded myself that this wasn't HYDRA and slowly followed Bruce forward.

My eyes instantly fell on Loki's body. He was completely still in the bed, his skin looking colder and more pale than normal. His lips, which were softly parted for his quiet breaths, were void of any colour and dry. A sheet was drawn up to his chest and his hair was scattered over the pillow.

"Em." Bucky murmured from behind me and I realised that I had stopped walking.

I slowly took a step forward, my heart thudding painfully in my chest, but my knees buckled under me. Bucky swore under his breath and hurriedly grabbed me around my waist as a weak sob slipped past my lips.

"Its better than it looks." Bruce tried to soothe me. "It's just because he hasn't been moving around a lot so he isn't getting much blood circulation."

"He should be awake." I fought to hold back the tears that were lining my eyes as I lent against Bucky. "He has magic. He should be able to heal himself."

"He should." Bruce admitted somewhat reluctantly. "I tested what I could of the bullets and they held the faintest hint of poison, enough to probably knock someone like you out for a fair time, but with his advanced physiology it should only be a couple of days, maximum."

I dragged my eyes back to Loki, roughly scrubbing away my tears as I shoved down the emotions. I wouldn't cry, not when he was in a worse off position then me. This wasn't about me. I slowly pushed away from Bucky and moved towards the edge of the bed, probably looking like a newborn foal trying to walk. I sunk down into the chair next to it, my hands trembling softly as I slowly reached out to thread my hand through his limp ones.

"We'll be outside if you need us." Bruce murmured, breaking through the silence and I looked up for a moment to see him gently nudging Bucky out, who seemed determine not to leave but eventually gave in and the door clicked shut behind them.

I looked back over at Loki and squeezed my eyes shut tightly as my nail unintentionally dug into his skin, a strangled sob escaping my lips as the tears rolled down my cheeks. I brought his hand up to my lips and I gently kissed his knuckle which was quickly dampened with my tears.

"I'm sorry Loki." My words were shaky and uneven. "I'm so sorry."

I squeezed my eyes shut even more and grasped his hand with both of my hands, trying not to look at the faint nail marks now patterning his skin. The beeping from his monitors rung in my ears, an almost taunting sound. I felt like I couldn't breathe, the sobs wracking my whole body as the whole world spun around me. I wanted to let go of his hand, he shouldn't be close to me when I was this emotional. I didn't want to loose control of the tumbling fire in my stomach and hurt him even more. But I was being selfish, so horribly selfish, and I couldn't let go of him. I didn't want too. I had to keep him close, just to know that he was okay.

"Em." A voice echoed and my head shot up, another twisted sound slipping past my lips.

My eyes darted straight to his face as I hurriedly blinked away the tears, but he was still in the same state. I cursed my head for hallucinating such a thing and I carefully put his hand back down, grabbing a handful of tissue from the box nearby to wipe away the tears and snot streaming down his face. I used a clean one to wipe his damp knuckles and threw them in the bin before I sat back down, on the edge of the bed this time. I shakily reached out carefully moved some of his hair out of his face, readjusting the pillow under his head before I sighed softly.