Loki Laufeyson - Saviour {2}

Chapter Sixty Three - Do Things in Your Own Time

LOKI POV

It was going to be a long night.

I wasn't necessarily complaining about it. How could I when Emily was literally clinging to my night shirt like it was her lifeline? I was being self-centered again but the small worm of guilt was slowly crawling back up into my throat and wrapped itself tightly around it. She was making enormous progress by being close to me, let alone actually wanting to be in the same bed as me. Not that I would ever do something horrible to her like those HYDRA bastards did. But I couldn't stop the constant thoughts that I was forcing her to be comfortable with everything that was happening between us.

Mother had never raised me to be one to force myself upon women, not that I would ever want to. They were such beautiful beings, she had even said that some believed they were touched by the Gods. I couldn't wrap my head around how people could ever want to hurt them, especially when it was for their own sick, twisted pleasure. Looking at how Emily was laying against me; her face free of any stress lines, eyelashes gently brushing her cheeks, hair a silky brown mess on the pillows, I was even almost scared to touch her myself. It looked like she would shatter line porcelain whenever I touched her.

I sighed and tried to swallow back the tightness in my throat, looking away from her as I rested my chin on top of her head. She had been through Hell, the deepest, darkest pits of Hell. I admired her bravery to even still be around humans at all, especially men. Not all would have the strength to face the world with similar pasts to what she had. I don't know if I would even be able to.

So her trusting me like this, trusting me enough to touch her, to kiss her, to sleep with her like this... I truly did feel honoured and proud that I could help build her back up to some sense of normalcy. But I was praying that she didn't think it was moving too fast. I mean, I was taking my time with things, but after all that she had gone through, it would be no surprise if she felt like it was going quick. I just couldn't help myself sometimes, she was just so sweet and beautiful that I wanted to show her how beautiful she was to me.

"Loki?" That soft voice broke through my thoughts and I immediately pulled my chin away from her head to meet her sleepy brown eyes. "Why are you still awake?"

"I take a little longer to get to sleep." I smiled softly, gently rubbing my thumb over the top of her clothes where my arms were still wrapped loosely around her waist. "It's okay darling, you can go back to sleep."

"Don't stay up all night." She tried to warn me, but her voice was too sleepy to hold any real tone.

"I won't." I huffed out a small chuckle, bringing my head down a little to gently kiss her forehead, instantly regretting a moment later as my previous thoughts came rushing back. "Goodnight Em." I tried to keep my tone steady as I watched her eyes flutter shut.

"Goodnight Loki." Her voice was barely a whisper and a couple of seconds later, she was pressed up against me again.

EMILY POV

I was suddenly woken up by a gentle movement next to me and immediately my eyes flew open, revealing a very groggy and blurry world.

"Shh, its okay." A voice suddenly spoke, gently helping to lay me back down. I hadn't even realised I had bolted upright. "It's me, Loki."

"Loki?" I repeated, my voice hoarse from sleeping.

"Do you remember what happened?" He asked gently, reaching out to brush my hair out of my face.

"I came to see you." I replied, faintly remembering the events of last night. "I couldn't sleep."

"That's right." He breathed out, seeming relieved. "I tried to sleep on the floor but-"

"I wouldn't let you." I interrupted, nodding slowly as I sat up. "It wouldn't have been too uncomfortable."

"Are you okay with it?" He asked, shuffling back to give me a little space.

"Of course." I nodded, barely having a second hesitation. "It was one of the best sleeps I've ever had."

"I'm glad to hear it." He smiled, the expression full of relief as he gently kissed the top of my forehead. "I was going to have a shower now, but do you want me to stay with you a little longer?"

"No, it's okay." I shook my head, smiling up at him as my sleepiness began to fade away a little. "I should probably head back to my room and have a shower too."

I slowly clambered out of his bed, straightening out my closed and trying to quickly run my hands through my tangled hair with an embarrassed burning on my cheeks. I could hear him moving around as I moved towards the door and I hesitated, pausing with my hand on the handle. Taking a deep breath, I slowly turned back around to see him making the bed. I slowly walked back over and he paused, straightening to look down at me with a soft but curious smile.

"Everything okay darling?" He asked as I stared up at him.

It was like I was only realising just now how tall he was and my cheeks burned as I realised the obvious flaw in my plan.

"Can you sit down on the bed?" I asked, trying to keep my tone steady but it still felt like it was coming out as a squeak.

"Of course." He slowly sat down on the bed, eyebrows furrowing as he continued to watch me.

I slowly stepped forward, my thighs bumping into his legs. I kept my head down, hair messily falling around my face as I tried to not talk myself out of it. He reached out and gently tucked some of my hair behind my ears.

"Em, darling, are you okay?" His eyes continued to flick over my face.

I took another deep breath and slowly lifted my head, meeting his eyes for a moment. I could see the concern dancing around in his eyes and I decided to put both of us out of our misery. I dipped my head down and gently pressed my lips to his. He startled slightly and his lips moved against mine for a moment before he pulled back. My heart sunk a little and I looked down at him, his hands braced on my waist.

"Hey, no, no, don't go like that." He must have seen the immediate drop in my expression because his hands darted up to my face.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled, suddenly really embarrassed that I had even dared to try something like that. "I just wanted to say thank you."

"Don't apologise." He shook his head firmly. "Please don't. I'm just worried. You looked absolutely terrified when you told me to sit down. You looked like you were forcing yourself to kiss me."

"N-no." I tried to protest but I knew he was right in some sort of way. "Okay, it did take a little bit of psyching up. But I wasn't completely terrified. I just wanted to say thank you."

"You don't have to express your gratitude in ways that push you out of your comfort zone." His hands dropped down from my face and gently took up my hands, rubbing his fingers over my scarred knuckles. "I know how uncomfortable physical affection can be for you. You don't have to make yourself do that kind of stuff just for me."

"I want to." I sighed, eyes looking down at our joined hands. "And I feel like the only way that I can teach myself that it is okay is to actually do it. And you're the best person for me to be comfortable with."

"I'm glad that you want to try." He smiled softly. "But only do things in your own time. Okay?"

"Okay." I nodded, my smile slowly matching his. "Thank you Loki."

"No problem darling."