Clean

forbidden stares

ﾟ:* ✶ Gibsie ✶ ﾟ:*

April 18, 2005

All I wanted was her.
I mean, that was obvious, and I'd always known it, but our breakup only intensified my feelings. No matter what she did, I still wanted her.

Even now as Hughie clapped a hand on my back and steered me away from her, I couldn't help but stare.

Her long blonde hair was in a ponytail and her Tommen uniform made her look like something straight out of every lads wet dreams. It wasn't fucking fair that she got to look this good. Her usual sunshiny demeanour was replaced with sadness.

I hope she's okay.

"Stop looking at her, lad. You're torturing yourself." Hughie nudged me, shaking his head in the process.

"Let him stare," Declan offered. "That's his best friend's sister, he'll be seeing her a fair bit."

"Way to kick a lad when he's down," Feely chuckled.

"How about you all pack it in," Johnny sighed. "We've got training in ten minutes."

"How are you holding up, Gibs?" Theo asked from beside me.

"I've been better, lad."

"Yeah, sorry." He offered me a smile.

Grace must really love Johnny if she broke this lads heart.

"Catch you guys later." Declan gave us a wave and jogged off towards the car park.

He was set on not joining rugby—even though it was in his genes to be good. His heart was set on hurling.

Apparently Shannon's brother was also big into hurling and they had some sort of bond around that.

"Lad, I know you're stuck on whining over Cap's sister," Hughie spoke. "But we could hit Biddies, and maybe get your ass to put on your shifting jacket."

"Don't encourage him," Johnny sighed. "Besides, Hugh, we are taken lads."

"And? Feely, Hayes and Gibs aren't," he shrugged. "We can be wingmen."

"Cap's to thank for that," Theo mumbled.

A furrow settled across Johnnys brow and I could tell he was biting back an apology, or a rude comment.

"We could go to Biddies," Feely nodded. "If Gibs wants to."

"I don't want to be anywhere without her." I released a frustrated groan. "Do you guys even know what heartbreak feels like?"

"No." Feely and Johnny said, at the same time Hughie and Theo nodded, "yes."

"It feels like someone's simultaneously twisting my heart and my balls, I mean, fuck, the girl has me so messed up." I groaned, scrubbing a hand over my face. "Johnny, your sister is the devil with the face of an angel, and she's definitely ruined my life."

"Don't call my sister a devil if you want to live another day, asshole."

"She broke my heart, Kav. I'm ruined."

"And she's still my baby sister."

"Traitor."

"Eejit."

"Now you're hurting my heart! I'll bet Declan will do the same."

"Jaysus," Johnny muttered. "Quit the whining and get into your gear." He looked to the rest of the lads, "all of you."

"First he steals my girl and next he's telling me what to do," Theo mumbled under his breath.

Feely bit back a laugh, following after him and towards the changing rooms. Hughie followed suite leaving Johnny and I in the hallway.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" He frowned.

"As long as it's not to see how your dick has healed," I nodded.

"Fuck off." He rolled his eyes. "Did Addy ever mention anything about Grace's home life?"

I thought about it for a minute before shaking my head, "nah, never. It's not like I asked though."

His expression faltered making me worry. "Why? Did she say something?"

"No," he shook his head. "I just, I don't know. I met her parents and she seemed...scared of them?"

"Scared how?"

"Fuck, Gibs, I don't know. Her dad just seemed like such a dick and her mam looked terrified to see me."

"Do you think they could be hurting her?"

"Yes...no...I don't know."

"Shit, lad, that's a very big accusation," I hummed.

"I know that! Fuck!"

"Listen, I have a suggestion that you might not like." I offered, giving him a shrug.

"What's that?"

"Talk to Theo. I mean, they dated for the better half of a month, maybe he knows something."

"You want me to talk to Theo, about the girl I stole from him?" He gaped at me like I was insane.

"I said you weren't going to like the suggestion." I gave him a cheeky grin.

"Cap, you told us to hurry up and you're out here talking to Gibs." Hughie poked his head out of the changing rooms, "hurry up."

"Christ, we are coming," Johnny snapped.

He was obviously worried about Gracelyn, which was fair enough all things considered. I just wish I could've created a time machine and forced the past Johnny to see him with his jocks in a twist over the girl.

"Hey, try not to worry. I'm sure you're just overthinking things." I gave him a pat on the back as we headed towards the changing rooms.

All the while, thoughts of his sister took over my mind. I was fucked. I was forever going to love Adeline Kavanagh.

No matter how hard I tried to stop.