Dangerously Close (Aris x Reader)

73) They're Screwed

My heart was still heavy when I woke up, my chest aching. I swore my throat was burning with vomit, but I didn't have the strength to do anything. I just want to lay here and rot.

Sure. He didn’t believe the rumors.

And somehow that still wasn't enough for him to stay.

Keeping my eyes shut, I let the tears drip down my face. Taking a shaky breath, I reached for Nameless just to find her gone.

And someone's arms carefully wrapped around me, their chin resting on top of my head as they held me.

My breath stopped for a moment, heart frantically pounding in my chest. Slowly, lightly, I grabbed his hand, pleading for him to acknowledge me. To say he still wants me. To promise he still loves me.

“Morning, poet,”He whispered, lacing our fingers together. Still feeling like my lips had been sewn shut, I rolled on my side, wincing as the injuries brushed against the bed. I didn't even bother to hide it now. 

“It's okay. I’ve got you,”He coaxed, laying on his back. Knowing it’d be ridiculous to try and do anything else, I settled on top of him, resting my head on his chest as I listened to his heartbeat.

Does it still beat for me?

“I’m sorry,”I said so quietly I can't even be sure he heard me.

He sighed before gently wrapping his arms around me. Nuzzling my face into the crook of his neck, I silently wished for the world to go away just for a moment. Just me and the people I love. Nothing bad, or evil, or painful.

It can't, but I can pretend.

He took a breath, seeming deep in thought, as though his words were the difference between light and dark. Staying still, I waited for whatever he had to say. Anything at all.

“I know I’m not the greatest boyfriend in the world. I’m not the fastest, or the strongest, or the smartest, or the best at anything really. I am great at loving you though. I do it everyday. You mean the world to me, and I want to be with you forever. I just want you to talk to me when something's wrong. And I know something has been, even before yesterday. Your nightmares are worse, you don't really sleep, you don't eat, you always keep yourself covered, you're hiding, and you just look so sad and worried all the time again. It looks like you're going backwards, and I don't want that for you. Whoever's bothering you, whatever's been happening, I’m here to help. If I don't even know where to start looking though, I can't do anything but watch you suffer. And I don't want to see you hurt anymore. You deserve more than that.”

“I’m sorry,”I whispered, my voice cracking as I held him close.

“Poet-”
“I’m sorry. I didn't think it would get to this. I-I didn't. I thought they would leave,”I tried to explain, my tears starting to spill.

“Who were you waiting to leave?”

“I’m sorry. I-I couldn't do anythin’ ‘bout it. I didn't-I don't want . . . I couldn't not not stop again. Just-I just wanted to be good. I’m tryin’. I'm tryin’ so hard to be-be good. And things keep tryin’ to make-make me not be. And . . . I’m sorry,”I choked out, gripping his shirt as I tried to keep myself as physically close to him as possible.

“You are good. You’ve always been good. Always.”

“I don't feel good, Aris.”

“Why don't you feel good?”

“I don't-I don't even know their names. I wouldn't-they wouldn't be humanized. I might not . . . not be able to-”
“Y/N, look at me,”He said firmly, his hands pulling my hair away from my face. Reluctantly doing so, I met his soft eyes.

He slowly started to cup my cheeks, staring at me as if he was waiting for me to tell him not to touch me.

Right now, he's the only one allowed to touch me.

“Who are they?”

I tried to find something to say. Some kind of words to tell him what was actually going on. Anything at all.

I couldn't. Just like the night I couldn't say I love you back, my voice seemed as good as gone.

Trying to ignore the shakiness of my hands, I managed to get off of him, laying on my back. Closing my eyes, I tugged my shirt off, wincing at the feel of the fabric against my bruises.

He didn't say anything. For what felt like years, he just stared at the injuries littering my skin, seeming to be holding his breath. That's how I know they're real though. That's how I know that even I’m not sure any of this makes sense, it’s happening anyway. That this isn't just a vivid nightmare that I can't wake up from.

“‘Member the night at the beach? The first one?”I whispered. He slowly nodded, already appearing to be putting the pieces together. “And the way it ended? With the two guys?”

He nodded again, meeting my gaze. Looking away, I found myself staring at Nameless on the other side of the room, curled up in a ball and fast asleep. She really is a pretty cat with shiny black fur and all.

Taking a much needed breath, I looked back at Aris, at the reason any of my life was like this right now. Full circle, it all comes back to him.

He thinks I’m good. He’s thought that before I even did. Most people here think I’m good. I sometimes think I am now.

And sometimes I have to hear otherwise from people who don't even know me.

“They didn't stop.”

He cradled my face, wiping my tears before they even started falling. It doesn't feel healthy. To be crying the way I have been. While never crying probably wasn't the greatest, something about this is worse. It's almost like I have something to be guilty of. And maybe there is. Maybe there isn't. Maybe this is who I am. Maybe it’s who I’ve always been. Maybe it's not real. I don't know yet.

I know it feels better to cry in front of him than alone though.

“It's okay. I’m going to make it stop.”

“What’re ya’ gonna do?”I asked quickly.

“Don't worry about that. For now, please stick by someone.”

“That’ll make it pretty hard to shower,”I pointed out.

“I’ll walk you there. Besides, it won't be long.”

“Aris, what are ya’ plannin’?”

Kissing my forehead, he lovingly held my face but kept his mouth shut. Great. Now I have to wonder what the hell this protective sweetheart is up to. That's not freaking me out at all.

“Don't worry your pretty head about it.”

“Don't do something stupid. Please? I don't want ya’ to get hurt,”I whispered, taking both his hands in mine.

“It's nothing stupid. I promise. I’m gonna make it all better,”He tried to assure me.

“I don't think ya’ can. Ya’ already tried, and that did nothin’ to make ‘em quit,”I gently reminded him.

“Don't worry about it. Okay? It's all going to be fine,”He insisted.

“Aris-”
“Y/N, I’ve got you. I won't let anyone hurt you. Not one soul,”He said firmly.

He’s strong. Mentally and physically, he’s resilient and such a fighter.

But he's not unbeatable. Nobody is. Especially if it's one against . . . oh no.

It would not be one against two, would it? My friend groups the size of a small classroom, and they're all loyal. Dare I say to the point of it being a flaw. Stubborn too and different kinds of strong but still strong. And, mostly, observant enough to definitely have noticed something was up and already talked about.

Damn. Those two guys whose names I don't even know are absolutely fucked.

Holding one of his hands, I wrapped it around my shoulder before curling up to his side. Carefully holding me back, he rested his chin on my head as I rested my head on his chest, closing my eyes as I tried to pretend this was going to end in any sort of peaceful.