More Than A Game

Chapter 34

Leaning against the metal railing of the balcony, the crisp and cool breeze gently danced against my face as I began to think deeply about my relationship with Chad.

As much as I loved him truly and deeply, I wasn't sure how much I would be able to take the broken communication between us. I understand being in a relationship was about finding barriers and breaking them down, but for some reason, Chad and I discover more challenges then solving them.

Trying to think of a logical way to clearly process my thoughts, I kept failing each time as I kept picturing my various moments with Ollie. What would have my life been like if I was instead in a relationship with Ollie? Would have I been more happier? Pushing away the thought, I turned around and noticed Angus slowly making his way towards me.

"Carmen?"

"If you're here for an argument Angus, then you're wasting your time. I'm not interested if that's what you're planning to do with your spare time."

"I'm here to see you Carmen, to help you, help you sort of your issues with Grace. Whatever it is that you two are fighting about, I'm sure it can easily be erased."

"I don't think I see your logic Angus. What Grace and I was arguing about that day had nothing to do with you or anyone, it's our business. I don't really need you to come into it."

"I know, I know. I understand that you're hurting but please Carmen, I want to try to make you feel somewhat better. That might be hard but at least I want you to know that I've got your back, no matter what."

I stood patiently taking in everything that Angus had said. Why he was being nice was beyond me, but I knew I had to agree to let him stay with me. He was one of the only people who weren't really involved in my bizarre love triangle so I suppose I should really return the favour and show kindness towards him too.

"Why Angus, why do you want to at least make me feel better? Grace is pretty upset over our argument, Chad is pretending like I don't even exist and there's probably another on of your teammates who need your support more than I do." I said secretly referring to Ollie.

"They might but you need support too. You've been so good towards me and leaving you suffering alone wouldn't make me a very good friend, especially since you and Ollie -"

"Me and Ollie? Is that what this conversation is about? Here I thought that you were trying to help but instead you're shoving something in front of my face that doesn't yet exist. That's what I don't understand with everybody."

"Wait no, I'm really sorry Carmen. I didn't mean anything like that. You're a really sweet girl but I wouldn't want to do anything to upset you. I was just going to say thank you, thank you for just being there for Ollie. Ever since meeting you, he's been more uplifted and energetic when I see him around."

My mouth formed into the shape of a tiny circle as I awkwardly stared at the ground in total shame. Here we go again Carmen, accusing others for what goes on in your mind. I felt bad for Angus since I didn't mean to take the blame out on him but right now, I just didn't have the energy to tell him how I was feeling at the moment.

"Are you alright Carmen? I didn't say anything wrong, did I?" Angus asked sheepishly as I nodded politely as he raised an eyebrow. I still felt pretty worked up about the argument with Grace but that was the least of problems on my mind. 

"Yes Angus, yes I'm fine."

"Come over here, everything will be okay." He said as I could feel my eyes begin to water. Angus gestured for me to come forward and give him a hug but I immediately hesitated.

"I... I can't. I'm sorry Angus, I thank you for the support, but right now I just can't." I admitted as Angus looked at me in sympathy. I felt angry I was pushing him away when he was clearly trying to help me, but of course there was nothing I could about it.