Bottle it Up

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Maya's P.O.V
I catch Riley staring at me. Well, my book in particular. "Damnit." I mutter to myself when I realize it says Lucas. I shove the book into my desk. At lunchtime, Riley puts her phone down and lays her fork on her lunch tray, "Maya, I know why you tease Lucas and call him names." She pauses and swallows a lump in her throat it seems. "You do that because you like him. You like Lucas. I'm going to do you a favor and break up with him." Riley places her hand on my shoulder and quietly says "Go ahead. I'm positive he likes you, he's been acting weird lately. Good luck." Riley walks out of the cafeteria, and Farkle appears in front of me. "Does she know? Maya why'd you fucking tell her? She'll be crushed and-" I interrupt him with "Shut up Farkle. She found out on her own. That's how fuckin close we were. God I wish we weren't for the first time in my life." I suddenly feel guilty after saying that, because sometimes we were mistaken for being in a relationship, Riles and I, and it felt like I was cheating. But I'm glad I'm letting all this shit out. It feels so damn good. Farkle's jaw drops. Then I remember we're dating. I grab his face and press my lips to his. The kiss is soft and gentle. Then I back away and say "You have to make sure Riley and Lucas don't break up. I can't let her lose her love." I say that because I know she loves him and I don't. I like him. I need to stop this web of trouble from happening. I walk quickly to the area of lockers where Riley and my lockers are. I see her standing there and looking in her locker mirror. "Riles, I don't like Lucas. I could never do that to you, ever. Just listen to me. Please." Riley's eyes seem to smile with relief. "Okay then, I guess I can believe you. "She hugs me and I feel like a lying friend. I don't like Lucas. I don't like Lucas. I try to convince myself this, but I keep coming back to knowing I like him. Bottle it up, Maya and you can explode to Farkle, your boyfriend. My life doesn't make sense. It's like a puzzle piece that doesn't have a place in the puzzle. The odd one out. Everyone else just knows who they're perfect for and I am just stuck in the middle of it all.

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