sorry // justin bieber

28.- a good sip

Justin

I look down at my glass before I take a good sip of wine.

I don't even like wine that much, but it's the strongest thing I have in the house and I don't want to be seen buying alcohol like some depressed post-break up dude. Specially not now that I am on every gossip show, blog and youtube channel.

It appears, this is what I do, I fuck things up. I couldn't even do anything. I didn't even fought for her. I could've stopped her when she made her way to the door. I could've convinced her nothing was wrong.

But I guess that would've been lying to her again, because something is wrong.

Something about my friendship with Halley feels so wrong to my relationship with my girlfriend but so right to me as a person.

And I broke my promise. I disappointed her. Again. And now she won't have me to make her feel better.

But she has that fucking dude. Connor. Ugh. His name is so ugly.

I drink what's left from my third glass and lay down on my couch, covering my body with a blanket I brought downstairs from my bedroom.

I feel lonely.

I just wanted someone to talk to, is that a crime? Of course not. I just didn't want to feel lonely anymore. I wanted a friend, a true friend. Someone who could be there.

My thoughts are depressing me. I'm so lame.

I can't even think straight. My tv is on but I don't hear anything, the picture is a little blurry now and I just want to sleep. Maybe I'll text her. Hailey or Halley? I don't know and their names are confusing me right now. I've never noticed they sound so similar. The blondie was right, I have to work my shit out before I do anything.

I cuddle on my couch like a puppy and close my eyes. I need some sleep. I just want to sleep.