**THIS CHAPTER INCLUDES STUDF ABOUT CUTTING AND SUICIDE SO IF YOU CANT HANDLE IT THEN DO NOT READ**
Its been 2 days since i found the painting and I've locked myself in my room. I just feel like its all my fault. My parents divorce, Mason, losing my 'friends', Alex's accident and the fact that my dad & i have a horrible relationship.
I haven't gotten up from bed to eat or anything, Alex, Andrew, my mom, Austin, even Michele have tried to make me come out but i just ignore them.
My mom called the doctor and they couldn't get in, i locked my door and moved my dresser in front of my door so they won't be able to come in even if they take the knob off.
" Camila please come out!" I heard i think either Andrew or Alex yell.
"No" i said in a low voice.
At this point I'm dehydrated and hungry.. I went into my bathroom to drink some of the sink water since i don't want to leave my room.
I looked around my room and saw my pictures.
The ones of my brothers, my mom and i when we went to Disneyland, the picture of my mom and i at my 13th birthday party, the painting of my dad and me.
Once again all the memories came back..the good ones AND the bad ones.
'If your mommy finds out shell cry and cry, If you tell her she'll leave the house and leave us'
"Wow i cant believe this dad, why? were we just not good enough that you had to cheat on my mom and have a new family! And made me believe all your stupid lies! and keep a secret from mom..I hate you. This is just something that i will never forgive you for. I hate you. I never want to see you in my life. Have fun with your new family!"
Alex coming up the stairs into my room calming me down. "Its going to be okay.."
It sucks how it went from
'I love you Daddy' , ' I love you more princess, you're my world'
"Bye mila i love you sweetie"
"Bye."
And thats all my fault.
I couldn't do it anymore.. All the pain..the memories..my life.
I cant do it anymore.
I got up from my bed and walked over to my bathroom and opened one of my drawers.
I took out something i haven't used in about a two years and a half...
my blade.
I sat on the floor and cried for about an hour.
***ALEX***
I tried calling Cam but she just wont get out of her room.
Im starting to worry..she was fine when we were playing play station then she just left to her room and locked herself in there.
She hasn't eaten in like two days.
I have this strange feeling in my stomach.. i feel like something bad is going on.
I got up from my bed and went to Camila's room.
I knocked about 5 million times and no answer.
"Cam!!!" I yelled.
"Go away!" She yelled back but her voice sounded different..like if shes..crying.
Crap no no no no.
Shes going to cut.
"Camila please open the door!!" I yelled banging on the door.
"Whats going on?" Andrew asked coming out of his room half asleep.
"I think Shes going to cut" i said shaking.
"Call mom shes at Austin's with Michele!" i told Andrew.
I couldnt open it but then i got an idea.
***Camila***
Alex was trying to open the door..ha good luck with that.
I took a look at my left wrist..then my right one..then both.
I could still see the old scars.
I put the blade over one of the old scars and took a deep breath..
" 1..2..3" and i cut it open.
I kept doing it over and over and over until my whole arm was full of blood..
I started to cry again. I looked at the painting and got up.
3 from my mom, 7 from Austin, 4 from Alex, 5 from Michele, 1 from Destiny, 3 from Lauren, 3 texts from Sarah, and 9 calls from..MY DAD.
I felt kind of dizzy as i was reading the 46 messages i had. I dialed my dads number, as it was ringing i heard a noise outside of my window, i ignored it.
"Hello?" i heard my dads voice on the other line.
"Hey dad its me.."
"Mila..how are you, where are you, I've been calling and calling I've been worried sick Alex called me"
"Im dizzy..and sleepy..i-im in my room, i know..dad..i-i love you, i love you and I'm so sorry i feel like-" and then i felt the room spinning and darker and darker,
"Mila!??Sweetie answer me! Whats going on!?!"
"dad i-i cant" and i fell to the floor.
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Loving You Is Easy- a.m
Fanfiction"how can you give him another chance when he has hurt you so badly?" "its love. it makes you do weird things." "cam are you sure you're willing to take that risk of him hurting you again?" "I don't know"
