In Love With My Bestfriend: Justin Bieber

Chapter 49 - I Feel Weak

I feel like shit. I don't feel right. The flashbacks of the night just keep replaying in my head over and over again. Non stop. I've been crying. I've been confused.

What did I do to deserve that? Why couldn't I just have the strength to stop it from happening? I feel weak. I feel violated.

As I lay here bawling my eyes out in my bed, I have Justin's music playing to calm me down. I need him. I need to hear his voice. Not just through the music. But if I call him, he will hear in my voice that I'm not okay. I don't want him to know.

I didn't go to school today. I said I was way too sick. Of course I lied. I just can't face anyone. I still want to be alone.

It's about five in the afternoon now. My friends have texted me a bunch of times. Including Justin. But I told each of them that I was fine. And that was it. I haven't even looked at my phone.

I guess Austin didn't go to school either because he showed up here earlier today. He was checking up on me. He also told me him and a few other guys jumped the guy who raped me.

I appreciate Austin for that.

**Earlier Today**

"Thank you" I told Austin quietly after telling me he got the guy jumped and beat the living shit out of him. He just got here a few minutes ago and I let him come in to sit.

"How are you holding up?" He asked and I wrapped the blanket around my shoulders as I leaned back against the couch. We are sitting in my living room right now. My parents are at work so no one can hear us talking about this.

"I'm okay" I said back in the same tone. I don't even want to talk right now.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked me and I shook my head. He looked at me sadly. "Then is there anything I can do to help?" He asked and I shook my head again.

"I just-" I stopped to take a deep breath. "It's on a consent replay in my head and I don't know how to stop it. I don't want to think about it anymore. I don't want to talk about it" I stopped talking again and tried to keep myself from crying again.

"We don't have to talk about it" Austin said quickly. "We can talk about prom o-or uh graduation" I love the fact that he is trying, but I'm really in no mood to talk about anything at all. "Who are you going to prom with?" He asked me.

"No one" I told him then stared out the window.

"Me too" He said making me look over at him confused. Austin Mahone going to prom alone? Every girl in the school is obsessed with him.

"You didn't ask anyone?" I asked him confused.

"No. I was waiting to see if this one girl had a date or not" he said with a laugh. "And now I know the answer" he told me.

"Oh" I said once I figured out he was talking about me. "You mean me" I said and he nodded slowly.

"I was going to ask someone else after everything that happened at Ryan's party, but with now two weeks left, I felt like everyone already had a date and I screwed my self over for waiting so long" He told me. I nodded understand. I guess that's my fault, but he should have just asked someone else back then. I looked back out the window. "Would you like to go to prom with me?" I heard him ask. I looked back over at him and nodded.