The Voices of Ana and Mia (Book 1)

Chapter 23: Because it depends on me being skinny

I was in that place again. The dark dreary place that held the old trees and dead rustling leaves. I sat near the tree and breathed deeply, the puffs of my breathing were visible. It was quiet, an eerie quiet and cold. I pulled my sweater closer to me and to my relief I still had skin on my bones.

Elizabeth

I heard the whisper and felt my body tense up. Who was calling my name in this forsaken place? I grabbed a tree branch and pulled myself to standing. I walked in the direction I assumed the whisper came from but I wasn't certain.

Elizabeth...

This time my name sounded like more of a hiss coming from whatever mouth was saying it. Intrigued by what the creature could be I found myself practically running towards the sound. I kept tripping over the large roots protruding from the ground and branches without leaves keep slapping my face and bare arms and legs.

Elizabethhhhhh....

I had to get to this voice; I had to find out where it was coming from. I kept stumbling and falling and welts were forming on my body from the branches but I didn't care.

I miss you Lizzy

I stopped suddenly and almost cried when I recognized Brian's voice. He was in my conscious! I had to find him. I found myself even deeper in this god-forsaken forest and finding I was going nowhere slumped on the ground.

"I miss you too buddy" I whispered, the tears starting to fall down my cheeks and into my hands. My hands, one beautiful and soft were now dried and cracked. This is what happened to me when I started starving myself and purging. My lips were chapped, my throat was on fire, and my body ached. This is where trying to be beautiful had gotten me. A disgusting skeleton mess.

When are you coming back home?

Even in my conscious I could feel my heart tighten up at Brian's question. I missed him so much and I actually imagined him talking to me. I could picture him wrapped up in covers on my bed. Oh how I needed him but I knew I couldn't get to him. I don't remember anything except hitting my head after seeing Kevin. I needed to get out of this comatose. I knew though, that as soon as I woke up I would find myself in the hospital. I couldn't go back home if I was in the hospital.

"I don't know buddy. When I get better" As soon as the words left my mouth I was hit with a realization. I was sick. Why else would I have fainted unless I was sick? When would I get better? I needed to see Brian! I needed him!

When you get better you better rush over here soon!

I found myself smiling brightly at how much it sounded just like Brian. I just wanted to pull him into a hug and kiss him! Or maybe just hear his voice would be enough for now, until I could get home. Then I remembered the piece of paper I had given him.

"Why don't you just call me buddy?"

"Elizabeth stop it" I jumped at the sound of the voice and found myself face-to-face with the devil himself.

"Ed" I could hear the hatred in my own voice and it shocked me slightly. He was still wearing black and still had an odd evil smile plastered on his face.

"You can't get to him you know. They won't let you see him until you are perfect"

"What do you mean?" I found myself very cautious of this being in front of me. He was only a voice in my head but in my dreams he took on the form of a perfect human being and I was very untrusting of perfection.

"You aren't thin enough yet. You aren't pure yet, so you are not perfect"

"I am thin!" I found myself yelling at him. I was skin and bones! I ached all over and not from beatings but from the side effects of purging and starving! I had passed out because I had not been eating enough! I was underweight and had a BMI of a person would be labeled anorexic and he was telling me I was still fat.