The Insiders

Part 15: Ponyboy's POV

I sat next to her and started to explain. "I'm so so so SO sorry Jasiah. I don't know what got into me. I was afraid I was going to lose you over Trent, I thought u loved him more than me." My voice started getting weak and tears were gathering up in my eyes, but I tried to hide it and kept talking, but it wasn't easy. "The day I met you, it has been the happiest day in a long time, I felt depressed for a while and I felt like I wanted to kill myself, but I bumped into you and you brightened my world and I didn't want to lose you, I couldn't.   I'm telling you the truth." And I started crying. She looked up and rested her head on the tree, she didn't look at me, she just looked into the emptiness of the night. "It really hurt me, what you did. Trent and I have been looking for each other for years and when we finally did, we had so much to say. We wanted to catch up on each other's lives. I loved him, but we were ten back then, that was old news, but now I really love you, I don want to let you go either. But it hurt me, like you stabbed me right in the heart. I want to forgive you. I really do, but it's going to take time. I love you, but what you did was not right." She said and I cried more. I hugged her, she surprisingly hugged me back. "I love you so much Jasiah, no matter who you love or what you do, ALWAYS remember that I love you, forever." I managed to say in between tears. But she didn't say it back "let's go home. I think enough has happened today..." Was all she said. We went home, with our long faces and without talking we went to my room to sleep. We didn't feel like doing anything right now. We got in bed and slept. All of a sudden, we were at a meet and greet, there were six men, in about their 50's signing photos for a huge line of shrieking girls, looking their best. when it was their turn, each of the girls freaked out and posed with the men facing someone with a small rectangular figure in their hand. The person holding the figure would count to three, and the figure would flash a bright light and the girls would stop posing with the men, shake their hands and leave. I watched the girls leave the building with the words " I can't believe that happened" or " that was literally the happiest moment of my life and even " that was the scariest thing ever, what if they didn't like me." Everything seemed so strange. The men looked like the older version of the gang. There was an older version of me, Sodapop, Johnny, Dally, Two-bit, Steve, but I didn't see an older version of Darry, which was weird. What was also weird was the older versions of Dally and Johnny, I thought they were dead. I went toward them to say hi but these big buff people came toward me and threw me out the building. I was screaming for the gang but they didn't hear me. " SODAPOP, HELP ME THEYRE TAKING ME AWAY."  And all of a sudden I woke up in bed, "it was a dream." I told myself " everything's okay" but then I looked around and saw Jesse, she looked so happy, so peaceful. I felt so sorry for what I did to her. Even though she was still asleep, I hugged her and slept like that for the rest of the night.