Since We Were 18 ⭐Nouis⭐

Chapter 30

Niall's POV:

I rolled over in bed the next morning and sighed as I felt the emptiness beside me. Louis was supposed to be moving his stuff back in today but once again he left. As I quietly sat up I began to wonder if my decision was the right one. Of course I love him him but does he really love me the same way?

The cold air seemed to become my new blanket as I removed the comforter. I shivered as I stood up. I had taken my shirt off last night since it gets hot when you are cuddled up next to someone. I pulled out a pair of light jeans with a black shirt. I pulled on a hoodie and socks before walking out to the bathroom. As I headed over I heard a lot of noise downstairs. I smiled when hearing Louis's laughter. Maybe things will be okay again.

I changed my clothes and brushed my teeth and practically skipped to the dining room where everyone except Connor was.

"How did you sleep babe?" Louis chirped as he bit into his toast. I felt my face start to turn red at the nickname he gave me.

"Pretty good. What about you?"

"Nice now that I have you with me again." I opened my mouth to say something but quickly closed it and shook my head at him while smiling. What is this boy doing to me?

"You're such a flirt." I looked down at the two girls seated in front of me. I bent down and gave both of them a small kiss on the top of their heads.

"Good morning girls." They both mumbled and continued to eat their cereal. I nodded over at Tate.

"Morning, bud."

"Morning, dad." I looked around at all of them.

"Why isn't Connor down here? Is he still sleeping?" Louis shrugged and sat his toast down.

"I was going to go check but he doesn't really like me so I figured I'd wait and let you go talk to him." I nodded and walked over to the kitchen.

"Yea I'll go see if he's up or not when I'm done eating." I put together some oatmeal with a cup of coffee and walked back to the dining room.

"Daddy I'm finished." Audrea looked over at me.

"Okay baby go play." She shook her head.

"I don't want to play." I sat my spoon down and reached over to hold her hand.

"Are you feeling okay?" She made a pouty face as tears came to her eyes.

"My head hurts and my tummy." I looked in her bowl and saw a lot of Cinnamon Toast Crunch left. I pushed it back away from her and felt her forehead.

"Whoa you are burning up." I stood up from the table and went to pick her up but Louis stopped me.

"No I got this. You eat your breakfast." I looked him in the eyes.

"Louis, one of my kids is sick and I'm going to make sure she is feeling better. I understand you want to help but there are some things that I need to do. Even something as simple as taking her temperature and giving her medicine." He looked away and nodded.

"Can I at least help then?" I finally picked her up put of her chair and pulled her to me. As soon as she was close enough she rested her head on my shoulder and went limp.

"Sure." I walked to the bathroom and told him what drawer the thermometer was in. He took it out and gently stuck it under her tongue. She let out a shaky breath as tears began to fall from her eyes.

"No baby don't cry. I'll make it all better." I pushed her hair away from her sweaty face as it began to beep. Lou pulled it put and read it.

"A hundred and two degrees." My eyes widened slightly. No wonder why she is crying she must feel like shit right now. I had him pull out two chewable ibuprofens and had her take them. I held her to me a while longer until little snores fell from her mouth. I continued to hold her and stood as he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around us.

"I'm so sorry ya'know. I really miss us. I miss the kids too." I swallowed and tried to ignore the feeling his touch gave me.

"I miss us too." I turned around and looked at him a moment before moving over into Audrea's room. I layed her down in her bed and gave her a small stuffed animal. She rolled over and cuddled into it making me smile. I turned around and saw Louis watching me with curious eyes. He watched as I went out if the room and shut the door.

"I'm so incredibly sorry for what I did. I love you. I always will." He shook his head but kept his eyes on mine.

"Louis." He took a step towards me and wrapped his left arm around my neck with his right hand on my hip. I reached my hands up to his wrists as he began to pull me into him.

"Not yet Louis. I love you. I know I do but... I'm not ready. I still need some time." His face seemed to have lost all emotion as all his facials sunk. He slowly pulled away from me and looked at the ground.

"M'sorry." I whispered as I stepped around him and walked back to the dining room. I looked down at my oatmeal and didn't really want it anymore. So I wrapped the bowl up in foil and stuck it in the fridge. I downed my cup of coffee and began to make another one. While it was being made I cleaned up Audrea's bowl along with Melia's.

When my coffee was finished I started up the stairs and to Connor's room. I knocked quietly on the door and didn't get a response so I slowly opened it. When I did he was standing next to the window sill holding a cigarette. Both of our mouths dropped as the realization set in.

"CONNOR WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!" I stomped over to him and swiped the object from his hands and threw it to the snow outside.

"I thought you stopped?" I questioned and he shrugged.

"I thought I did too."

"Where did you even get it from? How did you even get it? Why didn't you tell me that you were having cravings again?" Connor turned his head and looked out the window.

"You have enough to worry about already. I don't want to be another problem that you have to solve." I stepped towards him and shook my head.

"No kid is ever a problem. No matter how busy I am or how much I have going on you can come to me. No matter what happens you will always be important to me." I pulled him into a hug as he began to cry.

"Its okay Con." He shook his head.

"I'm sorry dad. I'm so sorry. I tried really hard not to do it." I held him steady and shook my head.

"No its okay really. You can have an off day sometimes and break down. Its okay. We all feel a little weak from time to time."

"No dad, it isn't that." He pulled away from me and wiped his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"I think I need therapy." I thought about that for a moment. I wanted to be the one that fixed him but maybe I can't fix him fully. Maybe I need a little help and I knew I'd do anything for him.

"Okay. Why do you think you need it? A lot of people can stop smoking with the help of others." He wiped under his eyes again before reaching down to his sleeves. He rolled them up and exposed various cuts spread across his wrists.

Word Count: 1346