Regain I ✔|EDITING|

chapter 31

John's POV

When I got the news, I frantically drove off, not minding the look Marcus had on his face and the distance the hospital was from Jared's house. I just couldn't help think that Amanda had already opened her eyes and I wasn't there to see her.

She probably had asked for me and no one would've been able to tell her I went to Jared's funeral.

I didn't feel like the Mosets, although very forgiving, would have liked to accompany me to their daughters destructor.

I scrunched up the paper in my front pocket. The paper becoming a bit heavy through the material of my pants. My mind scolding me for treating such a sentimental object carelessly. I needed to place it somewhere else.

But that was something that could wait, counting the minutes since Amy called, it was fifteen minutes prior and I was still on the road carelessly driving.

Today had been a hard emotional day and I was glad the news happened today, it gave me a sense of hope that things you pray for can come true and that I would see Ama's eyes again.

Her eyes.

I stopped the car as I looked at my watch, just 20 minutes.

Though it was unexpectedly shorter, it still was a full twenty minutes she had her eyes open.

I ran in trying to find her, I went straight into her room but she wasn't there.

Of course she wouldn't be, I thought to myself. She's better now.

"Ma'am" I stopped one of the nurses who walked past me.

She shot her head up as she gave me a sincere smile.

"Yes"

"Would you know where the patient that was here is, Amanda Moset," I asked worriedly.

"No need to worry sir, she was placed in the care unit since she's out of harms way." She said as she held me by my shoulder.

"Room 12" she said before she disappeared in the corner.

The unit was on the next floor. Using the stairs, I could feel every second passing.

I pushed the door open as everyone looked back at me. But my eyes were glued to the center of the room.

When our eyes meet, my heart softened and hers were teary.

She was crying.

In that moment, I didn't care that all her family was cramped into one place. I was just glad to see her.

"Ama" I lightly smiled as she tried to sit up but she cringed at the pain.

"Don't move you'll hurt yourself" I said as I came closer. Her skin was pale yet her eyes still held the same drive, the same passion.

"How about we leave you two alone for a while." Her mom said as everyone slowly began to exit the room, Amy first giving her a kiss on the cheek.

Once everyone left, I moved closer to her, holding her hand. I noticed the patch on her shoulder, a slight sting from the guilt telling me that everything that happened that day was all my fault.

"I missed you." Were the first real words I said to her squeezing her hand, engulfing myself in her covers.

"I missed you too" she croaked out, her voice breaking at the beginning.

"God you don't know how much; don't ever leave me again" I said looking in her eyes.

"Well I don't think I'll be here again for the same reason" she said getting up as she winced again. She still had pain in her shoulder.

"I'm sorry this happened to you, if I knew loving you would end you up like this. I'd probably have let you go"

To save her I would.

Maybe if I had declined to go to that meeting, where I met her again in life maybe she wouldn't be in this situation and Jared wouldn't have died.

"Don't say that" she quickly interrupted. "Not after all we've been through. Not after this. Everything happens for a reason whether coincidence or fate. I'm happy I'm with you."

"I'm the one who needs to give you a speech" I paused. "But I'll never leave you not ever. I promise." I said as I kissed her hand.

She brought back the life inside of me. The will and strength to keep going 'cause now I had my muse, my everything.

I don't know at what point in my life did she become all I needed to be happy. But all I knew was that she was now.

Its funny how a persons hand can fit into yours perfectly and feel so right, like it was made for you specifically. I don't know maybe it's just the love talking but it's true.

"You know I heard everything you said in these past few days, and how many times you've been here." She said as I zoned back to reality.

"Yeah" I approached. The doctors had mentioned it but I never thought she would.

"Yes" she sighed. "And I feel like I should apologize because I made you suffer a lot, I made you cry" she smiled on the last part of the sentence.

I smiled genuinely, I was never one to cry, she knew this but anyone in my situation would. I felt like I was going to lose her forever, to be left alone again.

"I'm just glad your okay, nothing hurts does it"I asked worriedly as she shook her head.

A wave of silence drifted on us, but it was a comfortable silence. Both of us lost in our own thoughts. Embracing each others company.

We sat there looking into each other's eyes. God I missed her eyes.

"John"she called.

"How was the funeral"she asked lowly, sort of unsure of herself.

I sighed. "Hard, what else could it be, he was my best friend. Other than the fact that he was unstable, he spent the best years of my life with me. His brother talked to me, wanted to take the house so I let him but when we got there, I found a letter" I paused. "He wrote for me and it just made me miss him a hell lot more, even when he was going to die, he had time for jokes." I lightly smiled as Ama squeezed my hand for support.

"I'm so sorry John, I really am. I wish I there with you, awake, supporting you." she said smiling.

"No, no one expected you to be at your shooters funeral"

"Yeah but I forgave him, there's no reason to hold a grudge anymore." She smiled at me.

I smiled back a little knowing he was right.

No one would stay mad at a dead guy.

**********

Yay, she's awake. Sorry for the short update, it just felt right to end it there.

Love you and leaving u

Weliqueen💋