Love Shy

Chapter Twenty Four

Finally Sean returned and I leaned over the back of the sofa as he shut the door and leant on the bannister to take off his shoes. He looked rough like he hadn't slept and he had yet to notice me. He began to ascend the stairs when I said his name. He stood staring at me for a minute. One foot on the second step and his hand still on the bannister. We just stared before he turned and came back down the steps. He walked accross the small space between the sofa and stairs and barely broke his stride to step over the back of the chair and slump down next to me in his tracksuit. He stayed resting in a crouched position looking straight ahead as I manoeuvred on to my side to watch him. Resting my my elbow on the back of the sofa to support my head. "whats up shy?" he finally spoke his voice hoarse. And I felt his pain acutely. "I was worried" I whispered and he nodded looking down at his hands. "sorry" he mumbled and I squeezed his arm. "I know" I said gently and he sighed. " I can't believe this shit. She's gone shy. Like gone for real" his voice broke and fresh tears sprung to my eyes. I moved closer and rested my head on his shoulder knowing he wouldn't let me hug him and he continued to stare at the tv screen. Finally Sean put on a movie and I was surprised he picked the cartoon Aladdin. "You member this?" He asked sheepishly no trace of the wannabe thug that was normally associated with my brother. As the opening Disney theme tune started I peeled my self from the sofa and rushed to get us snacks. When dad arrived 20 minutes later with uncle Roy and Kieran they didn't question our movie choice or the huge bowls of Cheerios we had. They didn't even say hi. They just joined us on the sofa. Squeezing in rather that sitting on separate chairs. Uncle Roy was nestled between me and dad and his arm was thrown over the back of the chair I curled into him and kissed his cheek. "I'm sorry uncle" I said quietly and he gave me a weak smile before squeezing my shoulder. "Me too baby love" the movie finished and Kieran went out. Sean stayed close to uncle Roy following him like a lost puppy and I felt sad at the realisation this family had lost another strong female. I stayed on the sofa not wanting to isolate myself and attempting to show support to uncle who had asked about school a hundred times now. It seemed his grief consumed him to the point he wasn't even aware of the repetitive conversations we were having and I didn't have the heart to point it out. After an hour of Simpsons and my wife and kids uncle excused himself to have diner upstairs. He was staying in the twins room so nothing needed to be set up as the twins always sorted their rooms before heading back to uni. I understood his need for solitude and after eating with dad and Sean and answering his questions about my stay at rios I also excused myself. Digging my phone out to put on charge I noticed 6 texts and dreaded opening them but did so anyway. Both carina and Kayla had sent messages of support. Rita had text to say sorry she had missed me leaving and she hoped I was ok. The fourth message was from Jordan.

Jordan.

What's up what's up what's up. Hope your alright soldier. Been sitting here waiting for some bighead gyal to text me and I'm bare disappointed. Just know I don't NEVER text no one first Kmt count yourself lucky. Holla at ya damn boy jordz x

I smiled feeling guilty that hours ago he had brought me lunch and tried to make me laugh the whole time and then I just left without so much as a thank you text. I felt rude and worried at the same time. I didn't wanna get too close to anyone right now. I chose to think about what I wanted to write as I read the next text. It was from rio and my heart felt like it would burst through my chest. Excitement and anxiety coursed through me as I opened the message not sure what to expect.

Hubby...x

Chyanne I'm sorry I left you alone today but I had to sort some stuff out and I thought it might be better to leave than to wait and make you feel awkward. I spent today at my dads trying to get us to come to a truce. He has agreed to let me move back with him so this week is my last week here then you won't have to see me again. I understand I hurt you but that was never my intention. Your the one thing that keeps me sane and it kills me that I let you down. I know I can't stay here and see you everyday and not be allowed to talk to you or touch you so I'm gonna give you the space you need. I'm hoping you won't forget what we had and how much you mean to me. I won't change my number so if you need me I'm a phone call away. I'm sorry. I miss you.