The brooks brothers Little sister (a janoskian fanfic)

Chapter 54- grief

Ellie's POV

Sleeping seemed like an impossible task right now, the pain was immense, it felt like it would never go away.

Beau, Luke and Jai we're asleep, all on beaus bed, i carefully reached over beau and grabbed his phone off the side, I knew his password, so I got in. He had a text from cousin Anthony, saying how sorry he was. That wouldn't bring her back though, nothing could.

It was now 7am, I wasn't going to sleep anyway so I carefully climbed over beau and went into the bathroom to wash my face. I caught a glance of my reflection, my eyes where puffy with dark bags under them, I looked disgusting.

I was scared for the future, does this mean beau is now my guardian? Or will be go back to Australia?

It was like my mind had switched itself if, unable to process what was happening, I just took every minute as it came.

I went back to the boys, I stopped and stood in the doorway for a minute. They where all latched on to each other, supporting and comforting one another. I was worried about Jai, he didn't show much emotion, he looked lifeless, at least they could somehow sleep, unlike me.

I went and slid into the bed, on the end next to Jai.

I latched onto him, in the process I must of woke him up because he stirred and looked at me sadly.

"Sorry" I whispered, not meaning to have woke him up.

He didn't say anything he just hugged me tighter, he played with my hair as I lied there.

Beaus POV

I woke up surrounded my my younger siblings, then it all came back to me, the pain and the truth of what had happened, I had to be strong for them, we could work this out.

I saw that Jai and Ellie where already awake. I had thought through some things last night, I had decided I would become Ellie's legal guardian, if that was okay with her. We would also go back to Australia for a while, for the funeral and that. I felt like I've had to grow up overnight, now I have Ellie and my little brothers depending on me. It was going to be hard, but we could do this.

"Jai, Ellie" I whispered, leaning over Luke.

They looked at me, there eyes puffy and red from crying.

"You guys okay?" I asked slowly, I knew they where not okay obviously, I just didn't know what else to ask them.

"Why would I be okay beau, my mum just died" jai stated, raising his voice as he frantically got up and left the room, Ellie burst into tears at Jais little outburst, this woke Luke up.

I sighed, a tear finding its way down my cheek.

"Come here bub" I said, she crawled over to me and soon after Luke joined in our hug.

Jai was suffering, well we all were but he didn't want comfort, he just wanted to be alone.

"Beau what's gonna happen to me?" Ellie said after a while.

"What do you mean baby?" I said, staying strong for her.

"Who's gonna be my legal guardian?" she whispered.

"I will, well if you want, I'd never leave you El, do you want me to be?" I said bravely.

"If course I do" she said as she hugged me tighter, I just hugged her back.

"This is gonna be so hard" luke sighed.

"I know lukey" I sighed deeply.

After that there was a knock on the door.

"Yeah" Luke called.

James and Daniel slowly walked in, obviously not really sure what to do.

They came and sat down on my bed, times like this you really do need your best friends, they looked like they had been crying too.

Daniel sat down and picked up Ellie onto his lap and hugged her tightly.

"Where's Jai?" James asked.

"He wanted to be alone" Luke shrugged.

"Oh okay" James sighed.

"Literally, anything we can do just say, we're always here, as your family" skip said.

"Thanks boys" I smiled, there support meant everything.

*the next day*

Luke's POV

It's now 2pm of the next day, we're all finding I really rough. Ellie basically hasn't stopped crying, she's in Beaus room in bed with him, I kinda feel for beau because as well of his own grief he has to deal with Ellie's. Jai hasn't come out his room since yesterday morning, we decided to leave him alone for a bit, but now I think is the right time for me to go check on him.

I knocked on his door, I could hear Elvis playing from the other side of it.

He didn't answer so I went ahead and pushed his door open.

He was in his bed, a grey hoodie covering his upper body and the cover pulled right up, as if he was hiding from the world.

"Jai" I said quietly.

I went over and sat on his head.

I put my hand on his back for support, I then noticed how his pillow was drenched in tears. The sight pained me, my other half was in so much pain.

He eventually turned over and looked at me.

"It's hurts luke" he whimpered.

I laid down with him, cuddling up to him, making him feel secure. When we where little we would do this whenever one of us was scared.

"Let me in Jai, how are you feeling" I asked, worried.

"I'm angry, lost" he sighed.

"Me too, we can be lost together"