The Unconditional Love (JuliElmo)

Chapter 11

Nothing happened. Thank God.

I was expecting na he’ll confront me and sasabihin niya saakin lahat ng sama ng loob niya and sasabihin niya saakin na galit siya and he still wants our baby to be aborted and stuffs.

But luckily, nothing like that happened.

Hangin hangin lang. Nauna siyang pumasok sa unit kanina and dumerecho siya sa restroom. To wash up, I thought. Pag labas niya kumuha lang siya ng unan and humiga na sa sofa. Leaving this king sized bed only for me.

My mom insisted na one bed lang ang ibigay saamin, para maging close kami and stuffs. Nakalimutan niyang puwedeng tulugan ang sofa.

Anyway we still have 2 days para magusap, para magkaayos. Yuh, 2 days na lang. Hope that’s enough.

I can’t sleep. So tumayo ako and lumabas ng kwarto, and there I see him. He’s sleeping in that not-so-big-enough couch. Yung paa niya lumagpas na ng couch, and yung kumot niya nahulog na sa sahig. Lumapit ako para ayusin ung kumot. Habang inaayos ko ung kumot, napaupo ako sa sahig and his face is all I wanna see.

Napangiti ako. Sobrang amo ng mukha niya, he has this baby faced features. Hell! How did he maintain this damn so perfect looks. His nose is perfectly placed, his eyes are even perfect kahit nakasara. And his lips are chapped, but it was soft when he kissed me that night when he was drunk. He’s perfect. Gusto kong hawakan ung mukha niya, pero hindi ko kaya. Gusto ko siyang halikan sa noo pero hindi ko kaya. Gusto ko siyang yakapin kahit nakahiga siya pero hindi ko kaya. See? Ang dami kong gustong gawin sa taong to pero hindi ko kaya.

I’m not tired. I will never get tired by just sitting here and watch him sleep. Tell me, am I crazy? Paano ko nakuhang mainlove sa taong to? Sa taong may mahal ng iba, na ate ko pa.

For once I wish that the time will stop. And gusto kong manatili sa ganitong position. Dahil alam kong bukas, something will change. I don’t exactly know what will change, but somehow I know that something is going to change.

I’m not yet sleepy. Pero ayokong madatnan ako ni Elmo na nakaupo dito sa sahig sa tabi niya at tinititigan lang siya while he’s sleeping. So I went back to the room and I curled myself to sleep, until everything went black. Yes, I’m finally asleep.

-

I woke up 8:30 this morning because of a call, Maqui’s call.

“Hm?” I answered lazily.

“Nasa honeymoon kayo ni Elmo, right?”

I was confused by her question.

“Yeah? What kind of question is that?”

“I thought I saw Elmo here sa school kanina. But hearing from you na andyan siya, I feel at ease. Hindi nga siguro siya yun. Or maybe ka look-alike lang. Oh well, May class pa ko. Bye! Call you again later!”

And she hung up.

Bumilis tibok ng puso ko. Is that possible? Elmo leaving me here alone? Well, yes. It’s possible.

Bumangon ako and I open the door. A sofa, with only a pillow, is lying there at the middle of the living room. No Elmo. Maybe Maqui was right, he’s there. He’s at Manila now.

But still, hindi pa ko sure. Malay mo lumipat lang ng unit since wala na ung mga relatives and friends namin. Or lumabas lang saglit since kakaiba ung ganda ng resort namin. So after I washed up, pumunta agad ako sa receiving area sa lobby and I immediately asked the receptionist.

“Yes po, Ma’am. Your family and friends, as well as your husband’s family and friends left together 5am this morning. And an hour after that, your husband left as well.”

“Are you sure my husband left? I mean hindi ba siya umalis lang saglit para mamasyal?”

“I don’t think so, Ma’am. May dala po kasi siyang maleta.”

Oh, dala niya gamit niya.

“Congratulations po.” Biglang bati ng receptionist sabay ngiti saakin.

“Hm?” Congratulations kasi iniwan ako ng asawa ko?

“Kinasal po kayo kahapon diba? That’s why binilin po ni sir San Jose na dapat empty ang resort?”

Tumango ako. And pinilit kong ngumiti. To show that I’m happy, to show that I’m having a blissful life. Funny, right?

“Thank you.”

Married life? I don’t exactly know what it is or how does it feels like!

When I was a kid, I have a dream of having a blissful life. Like marrying a man whom I love and who loves me so much. In that dream, I am happy. And so is my partner. But hey, it’s a dream, so it will never happen. I know that my relationship with Elmo will never work out. We don’t have something in common, we don’t have the connection, we don’t have that crazy cheesy thing that you called ‘love’. Well, ako lang naman yung nagmamahal sakanya. Sad, but true. Pero hindi pa huli ang lahat, I can always make that dream come true.

-

Alam kong ako ang antagonist sa love story nila ng sister ko pero tama bang iwan niya ko dito sa resort? It’s already 2pm and wala akong plano kundi ang humiga lang dito sa kamang to hanggang sa magsawa ako.

Hindi na tumigil sa katutulo tong luha ko since umakyat ako from the receiving area. Just 5 hours ago after knowing what Elmo just did.

I want to call him, but I don’t even have his number, even his friends’ number. And even if I have them, I don’t have guts to call them.

I want to curse him, but I can’t even say the words. Ganon na ba ako kapatay na patay sakanya?

I want to follow him, but I don’t want to see him now. Though I love him, masakit pa rin.