Why does everything suck?
All my relationships suck...
First one cheated on me with my best friend.
Second one didn't give a damn.
Third one bad things just happened.
Fourth one didn't listen to my consent.
Fifth one doesn't even treat me like a priority or shows me any affection/attention.
It's just so hard.
I've had more relationships than that but those weren't half as bad as these. . .
I see all my friends in these wonderful relationships that actually give each other attention and show that they care for each other.
My last boyfriend didn't last long, as we tried to work it out. He told me he hasn't loved me.... in like a month. I was heartbroken, and I still am. Of course, one day I'll forget all about him.
But it hurts. It hurts right now. It hurts with everything I feel. I can't look at him in the dining hall at college without him averting his eyes and getting up to leave as if he hates me. What did I do to deserve this?
I'm writing this while crying. I've been in pain like this for a week as it's happened. Just to dump me over Snapchat and admit he hasn't loved me. I mean, I sensed it was coming. I didn't want it to. He was a total dick to me that I realized.
I always texted him first. He only texted me first once. And that was when he broke it with me.
We never hang out and when we do it's either to please him or he's on his phone.
I thought he was this goofy, romantic, smart guy. Turns out he was only one of those things.
What's wrong with me? Am I just not pretty enough? Skinny enough? Smart enough? Attractive? Confident? Beautiful? Lovable?
What's so UNLIKABLE about me?!?!
Am I annoying? Is it my laugh? Weight? Hair? Body? Personality?
What is IT?!
I just want to know....
I'm just so upset right now.
I feel so alone.
I just want someone to hold me and tell me I'm worth something. I want someone to make me feel like I belong. I want someone to talk to me.
I just want to be held.
I'm so lonely and upset.
I'm so lonely...
