the fall • s.m.

48 • normal

// margot kate franklin //

@margotkatefranklin: they don't know about us...

• • •
like a week later...

"School sucks," I said to Remi. We were in her dorm room; I was sitting on the floor and she was laying in her bed. We both were attempting to work on homework at 10 o'clock at night, but we're expectedly getting distracted because a really good episode of Catfish was on, and school is for losers anyways.

Just kidding. School is for people who want to succeed.

"At least you don't need it to further yourself in your career," she said, giving me a look.

I shrugged. "True. But Margot Kate Franklin, teenage superstar and college graduate, sounds a lot better than Margot Kate Franklin, teenage superstar. You know?"

Remi rolled her eyes. "Speaking of teenage superstars, how's yours?"

I smiled. "He's good. He's leaving tomorrow, actually. But he's good. We're good," I told her.

She nodded. "That's...good."

We both laughed a little, and then neither of us said anything else for a moment.

"What's it like?" she asked.

"What's what like?"

She looked up from her work and at me. "Being in love."

I smiled and looked down at my laptop, the screen displaying a bunch of notes I didn't even understand. "It's amazing. Like, when you first realize you're in love with someone, it's like you have a whole new reason to live. It's kind of insane."

She gave an insipid smile, looking back at the textbook in her lap for a moment.

"But I mean, it's not exactly like that anymore. I mean, obviously I'm still as in love with him as I was in the beginning, but now it's just different. It's not like I get butterflies in my stomach every time I see him anymore. It's more like I see him, and I feel complete. Content. He's just mine and I'm used to it."

That's true. At this point it sort of feels like he's just another part of me. It just feels like we belong together, as dumb as that sounds. But it feels like that.

"That must be nice. To just know someone is always going to be yours. To know someone will always want to be yours. That's mind-boggling to me," she said, shaking her head.

I shrugged. "I don't know, Rem. We're young, really young. It kind of scares me that I'm putting all of my faith and trust and...I'm putting my everything into us, me and Shawn, and what if it just doesn't last?"

She didn't reply.

"I mean, it keeps me up at night. He's gone all the time, and so am I. He's becoming so much more popular, even more than before, and every day it's like more and more people realize how great he is. Which is amazing for him, and I'm really, really proud of him and all. And I know he'll never admit it, but I feel like I'm just a weight that is dragging him down and he might just be better off not being tied down to anyone. Especially me, the most problematic girl in America."

Remi shook her head, closing her book and looking me dead in the eye.

"Margot, you said it yourself. He's yours. He loves you more than anything else, it's so obvious. God, you should see the way he looks at you. The way he looks at you makes me feel like I'm interrupting something. When you two are in the same room, it's like no one else is there," she told me, and I involuntarily smiled. I got that giddy feeling I get only when I'm with him. He loves me. He's mine.