Save Me ; Phan ~ completed

chapter 56

||Phil's POV||

After a bit of talking we get into the bed, at nearly 4 in the morning. Dan fell asleep in a matter of minutes, leaving me staring up at the ceiling with too many things on my mind. 

The what if's and what are we going to do's swirl though my mind. Before I know it I'm silently crying and searching for some sort of answer. I got myself in this mess, and now I realize there is no easy way out. But god- none of this is easy. Not one damn bit. 

I can't seem to find an answer to this never ending problem. There's people looking for the two of us, maybe even wanting us dead, or in prison. I didn't think that running away from that town would be so hard. Now that we're all on our own I'm realizing this is a lot more difficult then we thought. Sometimes I just wish I was back in my room, or at dinner with my family. 

But I made this choice. We're both drowning in this mess. I told myself I'd save him. But now I'm just trying to keep myself above the water. 

Things aren't gonna go away just because we run from it. Everything is still chasing after us and we're losing our head start. At this point I'm just trying to keep myself level headed and keep him alive. 

So far, I'm not doing to well at either of those things. But shit, I never imagined I'd be doing this when I first met him. 

But still, here I sit, in a bed, cuddled up to a sleeping boy. We're alone. For once I'm not trying to be strong. I let the tears fall as every little thing I've been keeping in comes flooding out. 

"Mph.. Phil?" Dan mumbles, lifting his head off my chest to look up at me. "Are you crying?"

"Um.." I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath, smiling sadly at him. "Yeah." 

He looks as if he's going to ask why, but looks down and frowns. "I'm sorry." 

"Don't be." I say quickly, hugging him tightly. He leans up so he's looking me in the eyes and wipes my cheeks. 

"I love you." He whispers, kissing my cheek softly. 

"I love you too, Angel." I mumble, a smile appearing on my face. 

"You don't always have to be the strong one, you know.. I know this is hard on you too." He whispers knowingly, the tired tone in his voice calming me down. 

"I know.. I just wish I knew what to do." I sigh, taking a shaky breath. 

"You don't always have to have the answer.. We clearly don't know where to go from here.." He trails off sadly, but perks up, looking at me with a determined frown. "But hey, its okay. Because, we're alive. Maybe looking on the bright side for once won't do us too bad. I know I'm okay, because I'm with you. Although that may not give us the answer to everything, we're fine now. We can only deal with what's happening now." 

"I just want us to be okay." I mumble, pulling him closer and kissing his shoulder. 

"Me too.. We will be, eventually. Right now is just really hard."

"This is coming from the guy who was on my side of this argument just a few hours ago." I chuckle, sniffling. 

"You managed to change my views okay? Plus, I'm in a warm bed, snuggled up to you, and that's reason enough to be happy in my book." 

"Is that so..?" I mumble teasingly, pressing a kiss to his neck. I smile, pulling away as he shivers, biting his lip. 

"Your mood changes rather quickly." He states, blushing and biting back a smile. 

"Turns out you have that affect on me." I lean forwards, cupping his cheek and kissing him. 

I guess that was true, I went from tears to a blushing mess. I can't seem to wipe the smile off my face sometimes. I guess he was right. I can't keep wondering what I'm going to do in the far future. I'll get too caught up in it. Maybe it is best to take it day by day. Eventually, we'll figure it out. And I guess I'm okay if he's okay. 

~~779 words~~

A/N - I know its late and v short but I swear the chapters will get better! Also we're nearing the end of this book, so... ya. I'm also considering a book 2 but I'm not 100% sure yet. Let me know what y'all think. M'kay imma start writing the next chapter so its not late tomorrow :D

-M