Jared: Ughhhhh I don't wanna do this!
Me: Too bad! It'll be funnnnn!
Jared: No it won't. I've seen Connor's ask or dare book. It doesn't look or sound fun.
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(Let's all pretend I'm 22 in this! Horrraaayy!)
Jared: *Hugs back.* HA! I'm her favorite!
Me: . . . *Totally not jealous-* . . . . . . Welp, I think I'm going to the bar- *Walks out.*
Jared: . . . . . . Jay doesn't drink, do they?
Velo: *Shakes head 'No'. Still hugging Jared.*
Jared: Gah, jeez, I'll go check on them in a second.
Me: *Throws wallet onto the counter at a bar and sits down.* Just get me. . . Anything, I guess.
Bartender: *Sets a random drink in front of me. Walks away.*
Me: *Hesitantly drink drink.* . . . *Starts talking to self.* Gosh. . . I'm a bad mom. . . I've been moming her too much! I-I know I hated it whe- *Drinks more drink.* I hated when my mom yells at me for stuff like that, b-but I never yell-yelled, i-it was just a stern talking to! *Doesn't realize the bartender us listening.* God. . .Jared does dad her so much. . . I mom her all the time. . . GOD I'M A BAD PARENT!
Bartender: If you're a mom, it kinda seems like your job to-ya know- mom.
Me: *Jumps.* . . . My daughter likes her dad more than me. . .
Bartender: *Laughs.* So, doesn't mean she doesn't love yo-
Me: Yeah, can you try being comic relief this chapter?
Bartender: *Shrugs* Sure. *Says in extremely weird and goofy accent while waving his arms around.* yOuR dAUgHteR sTilL lOvES yOUuUu! Ooooo! i'M a spOOkY gHOsT! 👻 boo!
Me: *Laughs* Better.
Jared: *Burst through door. Sees me* GAH! FINALLY! HOW MANY BARS ARE THERE IN THIS TOWN?!
Jared: *Rolls eyes.* We both know, no one should be allowed to call me a "parent".
Me: *Giggles.* YEP.
Jared: Jay, you don't drink, come home!
Me: Hmmm. . . No! *Giggles.*
Jared: Gah, what's it gonna take??
Me: *Laughs.* Carry me to the car? *Tries not to blush.* And call me by my nickname?
Jared: . . . Whst nickname?
Me: *Really exaggerated frown.* Don't cha remember? Crazy pink powder lady got us drankin' once a-and you called me a nickname I liked. *Giggles.*
Jared: . . . Barely. . . Gah. . . Let me think. Was it honey?
Me: *Furiously shakes head no, with a disgusted look on my face.*
Jared: Sweet cheeks?
Me: *Shakes head no again.* Nope!
Jared: Babe?
Me: Noooo! Give ya a hint: I'd never admit to liking it. . .
Jared: *Thinks.* Is it. . . Juliet?
Me: No!
Jared: Gah!
Bartender: *Just so happened to have been here the night Vivi dragged us here. Walks past us, behind the counter, cleaning a glass.* You should learn how to treat your girl like royalty.
Jared: *Snaps fingers.* Queen!
Me: You're getting clooossseeerr!
Jared: Princess!
Me: Yep! *Hops on his back.*
Jared: *Mumbles.* I am sooo using that against you. *Starts walking home.* LET'S GO, PRINCESS.
Me: *Thinks: I don't care that he remembers now- I really missed that nickname. He says it differently when he's drunk though, it sounds hotter.*
