T W E N T Y F O U R
continuum.
A L E X A
"May we meet again."
My hands opened my door, slowly pulling it open. I tiptoed out of my room and made my way down the hall.
I found the stairs and climbed up stealthily, making sure no one saw or heard me.
I was now on the third story. The floor where my dad once slept.
I looked back and forth, making sure no one was on this floor. No one is supposed to be at night.
Once it was clear, I jogged down the dark, cold, empty hallway. I made a left and then a right.
Then I faced the door that I haven't seen in a long time.
I stopped to look at the door. I was too scared to go in.
But I was done being scared of facing it. I hesitantly turned the knob and pushed the door open.
It was so neat inside. It's like he never even slept in here. I felt a lump in my throat and I slowly stepped inside, leaving the door open as I looked around, tears stinging my eyes.
I tried to swallow the big lump in my throat, but it just wouldn't go away.
I noticed all the picture frames he had up with me.... with Mom.
I stayed in one spot in the middle of the room, just observing.
Tears left my eyes with no warning, my heart beating out of my chest.
My eyes looked down at the gun in my hand. It had lucille engraved in the side along with my initials.
"I-it's over. I can't- I can't keep fighting anymore." I choked on my words, my tears falling faster.
I cautiously raised the gun to my head, feeling the barrel on my temple.
I was such a coward for this but I just needed my family. I needed to go home.
My eyes closed and I breathed in heavily.
I exhaled deeply and re opened my eyes.
"Baby, why are you up- oh my god." I heard something drop behind me.
I bit my lower lip to stop me from crying out and I looked behind my shoulder. Carl.
Concern and fear was written all over his face.
"Stay- stay back, Carl." I warned him, turning around to face him.
"Alexa, please, put the gun down." He tried to walk closer.
"No, stop. Stay there." My lip quivered.
"Baby, please don't do this. Just- just give me the gun." Panic. That's all he felt.
Pain. That's all I felt.
"I can't." I cried, shaking my head slightly.
"I-I tried to be strong but I can't- I can't do it."
Carl watched me intently, observing my every move, making sure I wasn't going to try anything stupid.
My index finger moved towards the trigger.
"No!" Carl yelled, running and knocking me over just as I had pulled it.
The gunshot rang and the bullet went into the wall instead of my skull.
Carl had tackled on top of me, pinning me down. His hands took the gun and slid it away as far as he could.
"What did you do? Alexa, why did you do that?!" Carl yelled, tears now coming out of his eye.
I didn't respond, I just let more droplets fall out of my eyes.
"You- you can't do that! No!" His voice was still loud.
"I can't do this." I whispered, my eyes locking onto his.
"Alexa, these people- they- they need you! You're their leader! They need a strong leader even if you have to pretend to be strong, you have to do it. Negan wouldn't want you to do this."
"They need you! You were going to leave them helpless?! You were going to leave them to die? You were going to leave me?!" He shouted.
"I-I'm sorry." I couldn't stop my cries.
"You promised me you'd never leave me. You say you can't do it without me, how the hell did you expect me to do this without you?! I love you! You can't leave me!" He was scared.
I was scared.
I wasn't thinking.
"I wasn't thinking Carl." My voice was still hoarse and barely audible.
"You pulled the trigger. You were going to do it." His lowered his voice, his tears falling fast.
"I'm here to help you, Alexa! This is not an option! You can't do that to me . P-please don't do that to me." He begged.
"I'm so sorry Carl."
"No, I'm sorry." Carl lifted me up, embracing me tightly.
My arms did just the same.
"I miss him so much." I sobbed into his chest.
"I know, baby, I know." He sat down, pulling me into him, his tears not stopping.
His lips kissed the top of my head as I soaked his shirt.
"M-my Dad told me when I got my eye shot out that this is a new world.... I-I want to show you the new world." I could feel how fast his heart was beating. He was terrified.
"I need you here, baby. You were born to survive."
Short but effective chapter
