Missed Opportunities // Dan Howell x Reader

Chapter 39

A/N: If you have no ideas of what you want your bed to look like here are some ideas. Although whatever you do end up choosing you do have dark purple bedsheets soooo...

Chapter 39

Dan's POV

We started to head back to Y/N's home. She was driving again and I started to stare out the window.

I should stay on Phil's good side if I'm dating his sister. And I know what I said to him was out of line. That's why I stopped-
But was it, though?

I hated the way he was hurting Y/N.
Unless,

I was the one hurting Y/N.

My thoughts were cut off by the sound of her voice

"Maybe this was a mistake," she says and I begin to sweat "seeing Maddie today." I exhaled knowing she wasn't talking about us

"Why?"

"Well, I don't even know why I did it. She was unconscious, it's not like I was really seeing her. I just looked at her body- knowing there was a chance..."

Knowing there was a chance she could stay that way forever. She didn't say it but she thought it

She stops speaking so she doesn't cry and I hold her free hand

"Can we talk when we get back to mines?" she asks

"Of course."

Later on...

We get back and Y/N heads to her room.

"Did it not go so well?" Joe says pointing his head in the direction of Y/N who has speed walked away

"It was... intense"

"Gotcha" he says when his phone dings

"Is it Zoe?"

"It's Phil. He wants to know if you're staying the night."

"..." I pause a moment before running into
Y/N's room.

She's changed into a black tang top and grey shorts and sitting cross legged on her dark purple bed sheets.

"You said we needed to talk... listen I know what I said wa-"

"Do you hate me?"

"Woah what?"

"Do you?" she made sure to look in my eyes this time

I stopped and stared at her. I looked at all of her and all I had in front of me. How could anyone hate this?

"No."

"But-"

"Why would I ever hate you?"

"After everything I've done. I went crying to you, I brought you into my  problematic life. Then I made you lie to Phil and when you told the truth, I had a panic attack. There's a lot I haven't told you about the past and how I can get. And now- you said it yourself, no matter how much you try he won't even talk to you!"

I paused to read her expression. She wasn't in a good state at this moment. Or even in this time of her life, I went in to hold her,

"Don't!" I jumped back "I don't want it if it's fake. I don't want sympathy or false acceptance..." I start to tear up "not again." she whispers the last part

"I could never hate you. If there was anyone you had to go to, I'm glad to be that person for you. I always wanna be there, whether it's a panic attack, tears, Maddie, WHATEVER! I'd never erase this or let you go. I couldn't give a shit, how 'problematic' you say you are. I can show you how much you're worth! I love you!"

I wrap my arms around her in a hug as she lays her head down on my chest

"I thought you hated me," I confess while I feel my shirt grow slightly damp as her face leans against my shirt, but I don't mind

"You'd have less drama or trouble if I wasn't yours. Phil wouldn't be upset... you don't hate me do you?"

"No. Of course not." And that's when I could tell she understood.

"I love you too." She replies back to my earlier statement. And with that she slowly drifted to bed

I wish I could stay,

But I had one more person to tend to."

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A/N: based on true emotions.

So I can't really ask if it was cheesey or too dramatic...
Just if you want stuff like that or if I should get rid of it for future books/ chapters

-Lei xox