Lost and found by seventeen

Part 25

The next day came in a flash and I remembered it was the performance team's turn to come and visit. I sat down on my bed patiently for them to come with their arms wide open. I remembered what happened last night with that boy. I hope he could be my friend. The sudden knock distracted my thoughts. Five boys kept piling in. "Ara!" Jeonghan came running to me with watery eyes. He pulled me into his warm embrace. I wrapped my arms around his neck and patted his back. "I'm fine. See I'm healthy!" He took a good look of me and smiled,"Woah, since when did you get bigger? Even the doctors think you'll be fine by today. You can leave tomorrow." My eyes sparkled. Finally. I can leave this place with no regrets. To be honest, it did help me a lot but it just gave me the concept of being crazy. Jeonghan was happy to see me but his eyes were a mixture of puffy and black due to no sleep. I looked at the rest of the members to see  the same pattern. "You guys look miserable. Did you guys get any sleep?" Seokmin showed his signature smile,"Ah we had a lot of practice and were worried about you too." I felt pity for all of them. They worried so much about me but not about their own health. I should be healthier and take care of myself and all of them too then. I promise. "Ah you know I met a kid named Dae!" I tried to change the subject. Jeonghan ran his fingers through my hair. "Really? That's good. He's just a friend right?" I stood silently trying to connect the dots. "A-ah! He's just a friend! Only a friend nothing more!" I hit Jeonghan playfully multiple times. He laughed loudly despite his poor condition. The rest of the boys were either sitting on the edge of my bed or on the small sofa. Woozi was standing next to Jeonghan and I scooted over to let him sit down next to me. Jeonghan moved over to the couch to let Woozi pass through. He lied down next to me and I cuddled up next to him. "Are you tired too Oppa?" I whispered silently. He hummed,
"Kind of but it's fine." I nodded feeling the pity overwhelming me. "You know ever since I came here during the silence of being alone I just think about many things. Like my parents and my grandmother and you guys. I'm glad I have you guys. I realized how lucky I was. I'm even lucky to have parents to teach me how scary life is. I even thought about the memories I have with them. I'm not scared of them anymore I think. I just regret them because I wish I could change those moments but I can't do anything about it now." I took a deep breath letting out my emotions. Woozi ruffled my hair and smiled,"I'm glad you took some time to think. I'm proud of you Ara." I hope I can make them proud everyday. I snuggled into his chest and let out a couple dose of tears before getting knocked out to sleep.
~Dream~
The roof of the hospital. I registered where I was. The sky was a nice shade of purple and pink. I was wearing a white dress with no shoes. My hair was braided cutely. "Ara!" I heard a voice behind me. I twirled around and saw my parents. They were smiling. Mom looked pretty smiling and Dad looked younger. I ran to them to hug them tightly. Then a stronger force pushed me back down to the ground. "Who told you that you can hug me? Are you serious?" Mom shrieked dusting off her dress. "Did you really think that just because you're all confident that we would apologize or whatever?" Dad shouted. I was shivering on the ground that gave me goosebumps. The sky turned dark blue and then everything turned black.
~end~
Sweat. My pillow was wet with my sweat. I checked my hands to see them shaking uncontrollably. Damn it Ara. I huddled up trying to warm myself with my own body heat. I cried with no thinking. No thoughts. I just wanted to cry. I wanted to change. I wanted to have a happy life. Why can't I? I looked around me and saw a lunchbox and a note. It must've been from the vocal team. I sighed feeling sorry for them. I felt bad for them for adopting a girl with issues. A girl with a bad past and depression. I shouldn't cry so much in case a doctor comes in and makes me stay for another week or two. I checked the time and it was 4:00 am. Maybe I can just wait for 4 hours until visiting hours so I can finally leave. I just wanna leave. I don't care if it means I'm not healthy yet. I just want to get out of here.