Regular

Distractions=Hobbies

I am terribly sorry for the delay. I was on vacation and my computer wouldn't connect to wi-fi. Plus, I was in water 90% of the time anyways. So, here's the chapter you've been waiting on! :D Thank you all for the support!!

*****

*Two Weeks Later*

Distractions=Hobbies!

Lately, I have been taking up various hobbies. Fay tried to teach me to sing, Erica tried to teach me to draw, and I found other things to occupy my thoughts. Anytime I didn't have something going on, I felt miserable. When I wasn't doing anything, I thought about Darnellel, Nathan, and running off. I needed a cure, and it was there... For a while.

The fight between me and Darnellel replayed. Should I have said that? Was I too mean? Did I cross a line that I didn't know existed. I was beginning to feel like myself again--the whole thing with Molly started to fade away. But a piece of me knew that I would never forget it. I wouldn't be able to forget everything she said, did... I cringed at the thoughts.

Darnellel loved me. But after that fight, I wasn't sure where we stood. Were we together? Did we break up? Which one did he want? Which one did I want? I wanted to be with Darnellel, but I didn't want to have to explain to him the horrific details that I was actually forgetting with all the hobbies I picked up. Were all girls like this when it came to boys and problems? Did they have these twisted thoughts that confused the hell out of them?

I was alone in my room. Erica told me to follow the directions on the drawing guide thingie. Like, those sketchbooks that have the step-by-step instructions on how to draw an animal or a human. I continued to learn while Erica was taking care of something. She didn't tell me what, but she just said it was important. I made sure my drawings looked like the ones in the book. I failed epiclly. I am a crappy artist.

I wasn't that bad at singing. Fay said that I wasn't as good as her, but I wasn't awful. I took it as a compliment and moved on. Moving on was becoming easy for me. So easy in fact... I felt healed. I felt like everything that happened two weeks ago meant, well, nothing. I mean, yes, I'm scarred for life, but I'm not depressed of it. Just because something like that happens, it's up to you on how you want to handle it.

Issac--given he was the only one who knew besides Fay--tried to drag me into therapy and I kept resisting. I didn't want to tell a shrink about how I got raped by a girl. So Issac decided he was going to give me therapy sessions. And our first session, he told me to actually say the word. It supposedly helped. And whenever I thought the word, or said it, it had no effect. I don't like saying the word. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I am so weird.

The quote, "Time heals the wounds that you feel somehow" is actually true. I understand that some people just can't seem to get over something as traumatic as that, but time eventually heals almost everything. Everyone is different--and that's not a bad thing.

As for Darnellel and I... We weren't talking. It was like we did everything we could to just not see or talk to one another. I mean, yes, that fight was terrible, but we both needed thinking time. And the fact that he hadn't once stopped in to try and talk to me, confused me. Most boyfriends try to make ends meet with their girlfriend after a fight.

"Hi!" Erica knocked on the door.

I looked up and smiled. "Hi."

"How's the drawing coming?" she asked sitting next to me.

"Terribly," I sighed showing her my failed attempt.

"You aren't doing bad at all. You just need to work on it more," she smiled at me.

I shrugged and shut the sketchbook.

"Hey, I was sent by an anonymous person to come and lead you to an anonymous place," Erica smiled wider.

"Um, okay?" I chuckled standing up.

Erica blindfolded me and dragged me by my arm. I had to run to keep up with her. I knew Erica well, so I knew asking her where she was taking me would be pointless. When she finally let me go and I stumbled to the floor. Concrete. I stood up and felt where the bleeding had started.

"Can I take this thing off now?" I asked.

"Yes," Darnellel's voice chuckled.

I took it off, and looked at him confused. What did he want? Where was I? I looked around and looked back at Erica who just nodded with a smile on her face. I sighed and faced Darnellel yet again.

"What is all this?" I asked.

"An apology. And a question, but I'll ask later on," he shrugged.

I pressed my lips into a line and nodded. I waited for his apology.

"Kate, I'm really sorry about our fight. I understand why you got angry with me. I should've come for you. I should've done something. I don't know what I was thinking. I just... I don't want to lose you, Kate," he said.

"That sounds like it's been rehearsed," I folded my arms.

Darnellel sighed and put his hands on the sides of his head. "I didn't rehearse it, Kate. I'm trying. I'm trying to be better. It's been two weeks, Kate. You look good, but I know something happened, and you won't tell me. All I want to do is help."

"And if you had listened, I told you that no one could help me. And... Look. I miss us, too. But you just don't understand. I'm willing to put this behind us, if you'll just stop pretending to give a damn about what impresses me. I mean... Why are you trying so hard?" I looked in his eyes.

"Damnit, because I love you, Kate!" he exploded.

I swear, I couldn't breathe.

He breathed and looked at me. "I love you, Kate, and I'm sorry that I didn't come for you, but... It's over. Whatever she did is over with, and I'm trying to keep us together. I love you, Kate, and I feel like if I don't make things right, I'll lose you forever."

I blinked and started breathing again. I put my head to my forehead and swallowed. I chuckled. "What have you been smoking?"

"Huh?" he raised an eyebrow.

"There's no way you love me!" I looked at him. "It's not possible. No one--not even Nathan--has told me that. No one loves me, Darnellel. Why should I believe you do?"

"Because," he said stepping closer and taking my hand. "I want to marry you, Kate. That's how much I love you. I want us to be together forever. Marry me, Kate."