Antidote (Jacksepticeye x reader)

Chapter 40

Quickly after my small tantrum, I apologized to Felix and Signe for going off on them for no reason. I didn't explain how I was feeling at this time, probably because this is a feeling I can't explain easily, so I just told them I was feeling sick. They said to take it slowly and asked if they wanted to walk to my house with me. I shook my head no and they understood (thankfully).

After P.E., I instantly left the buliding before Mark could ask any questions. I listened to ‘LOVE.’ by Kendrick Lamar because it's only out of human nature to listen to sad songs/ songs that make you sad when you're already sad. And since I'm feeling the way I'm feeling now, I figured listening to a song about love fits perfectly with the mood I'm currently in: in between two worlds that includes love.

I sighed, tossing my bag onto my shoulders, and accidently hitting someone while doing so. I instantly turned around to see the fallen body, holding their shoulder in pain.

“Holy shit! Ashley, you ok?” I quickly rushed to her side. She exhaled sharply, before looking up with a small smile and brushing her hair out of her face. “Why we're you behind me in the first place?”

“Sorry, that's just me being a klutz,” I extended my hand out for her and she grabbed onto it, “I was going to ask you a question before you left.” I pulled her back up onto her two feet again, and she dusted herself off, acting as if nothing happened.

“My question is why?” She suddenly asked. I cocked my head to the side and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

“Why what?”

“Why did you tell Sean to do those things? Why direct him to show affection to me when I purposely told you that I was breaking up with him for you?” She asked.

“Pardon?” I was genuinely confused on where she was going with this.

“(Y/N), I said I'm done with Sean, my time with him is done, and if we stay together even after our time has expired,” the blonde started to fiddle with her fingers, avoiding eye contact with me, “bad things might happen. And I'm trying to avoid that.”

“Please, don't send him to me. I know you like him, I've seen the way you've been when you're around him and not, so just make it final with him and take me completely out of the picture.” She said. Ashely was determined on staying true to her word, but I was still worried on her when her mental illness comes back to haunt her.

“You like him, correct?” Looking back at it, Sean and I were practically the same person. We're both pretty loud and chaotic, have the same interes in most things, are pretty damn smart and logical. Not to mention how breathtaking he is. His vibrant blue eyes compliment his pale skin and button red nose perfectly. His strong, veiny arms whenever he carries something heavy, and that look. Oh that look, he has when he's focus on something is just some of the things he has to make all the panties drop. Aside our painful past, Sean and I do have some type of connection, if I do say so myself. A shitty one at that.

I blushed at the thought.

“W-well, my feeling differ.” I responded. All of a sudden, she grabbed me by my arm and brought me eye to eye with her. That same glare she had when we were on the roof and I tried to get close to her, is the same glare she had now.

“Then be with them.” She said- more like demanded. Scared, I nodded profusely. She sighed, her grip on my arm losses as she walked backwards and away from me. I was conflicted. Should I keep doing what I do, or should I listen and actually take Jack for myself?

But the constant question floating around in my small head is

How is Ashley going to survive?

Now that I know more about her, my worries about her and her mental health has kept me on my feet. I don't want to date Sean, have him forget everyone about his relationship with Ashley, then have her go through a panic attack or something along those lines and have no one to help her. I could only imagine how scary that is; to go through a panic attack alone.

But she has told me, multiple times, that's she's alright without him. She did say that she had her family to support, and that bad things might happen if they stay together longer.

Sighing, I rubbed my temples and swing my bag over my shoulders, leaving the buliding and resuming my music. I had a lot on my mind now, I doubt that I'll get good sleep tonight.

--

SNAPCHAT
Hentailover69 is typing…

SNAPCHAT
From Hentailover69.

Hentailover69:
Hi Sean
I have to talk to you about something

Jackspidecy:
If it's about the history I said I'm sorry about looking down at my notes that was so much shit to remember😥

Hentailover69:
It's not about the history
And if you didn't notice, I looked down at my notes too😓
What I have to say is about Ashley

Jackspidecy:
What about her?
I did what you said
And when I did
She wasn't happy😓

Hentailover69:
Yeah…
About that
Break up with her for a hot second
It's her request

Jackspidecy:
Aight

Hentailover69:
Cool
I'm not suprised that you didn't hesitate
Did you even like her?

SNAPCHAT
Jackspidecy is typing…
.
.
.
.
.
.
SNAPCHAT
From Jackspidecy.

Jackspidecy:
Without Ashely, I wouldn't be Jack.
She shaped Jack.
Once I set eyes on that girl
My whole world changed.
But now
That feeling is gone.
It disappeared with the real me.

Hentailover69:
So then
Who am I talking to now?

SNAPCHAT
Jackspidecy is typing…
.
.
.
.
.
.
SNAPCHAT
From Jackspidecy.

Jackspidecy:
You're talking to Sean.
Jack is only around when Ashley is here.

Hentailover69:
Well
Hello there Sean.
Are you willing to restart and reboot?

Jackspidecy:
Yeah.
I'm ready to be Sean again.

--

I threw my phone across my bed, putting my hand over my chest as I placed my head on my white pillow.

My heart was beating fast, but why?

(so, what would you do if I suddenly said I wanted to write a book that isn't a jack/mark x reader and I already have like the first six chapters prewritten?)

(Edit: you literally have no idea how excited I am to upload all the chapters I've written! Like, I already have proff edited them and I'm like "fuckkk hurry up tommrow I wanna put up the new chapter"!!)