Silent laughter

Pain

*Naruto's POV

My alarm goes off as I groan sitting up out of bed. It's been three weeks since Asuma's death, and I am still struggling to recover after his death. I got dress and brushed my teeth at a snail's pace. I was very close with the leader of team 10 due to his father being the Hokage before my father. I walked towards dad's office passing by the graveyard where he was buried. I walked up to Asuma's head stone and placed a flowers on it that I picked earlier. Usually I visit his grave with Shikamaru, but I doesn't help the sinking feeling in my stomach

'I couldn't help them' I thought thinking back to the to how I was in the hospital when Asuma died. I stood up looking down at the head stone one more time

'I'm sorry Asuma' I thought as I stood up. I closed my eyes and teleported. I now stood in my father's office looking out the window that looks over the whole village.

"Hey Naruto" Dad said without looking up from his paperwork. I continued to stand at the window gazing endlessly out it.

'Something is wrong' I thought as the knot in my stomach grew larger and larger to the point where I had to sit down. Me and dad sat there for a while before he spoke up

"you feel it to?" he asked. I nodded my head in agreement, and we went back to our silence. It was around 10:00 AM when one of the jonin who works at the office knocked on my fathers door.

"Sir lady Tsunade is here to see you and she says it's urgent" He said

"Send her in" Dad said as the jonin bowed and walked out the door. A few moments later Tsunade walked in. She was bobbing side to side like a leaf down a strong current.

"Tsunade were you drinking again" Dad asked as he helped her into a seat.

"Minato-" She began to say before dad interrupted her

"You should be resting" He said as he took the bottle from her hand

"Minato Jiraiya is-" She tried again, but dad stopped her.

"Let's get you home so-" Dad said before Tsunade got tired of being interupted and cut him off

"Jiraiya is dead" She said through two streams of tears that now flowed down her face. The room was dead still as the news hit us like a wave

(Haha not funny Tsunade) I said, but I knew deep down it was true. Tears were streaming down my face as I rushed up to her grabbing the front of her shirt pulling her closer to me.

"Tell... me your... joking" I said to her, but my tears were met with hers.

"Naruto! get off of her" Dad yelled at me.

"One of his summoning came to me last night with the news and a message" She said as she pushed me off "The real one is not among them, He said". Silence. Not a sound until through the silence my anger, and sadness washed it away. I slowly turned to face dad who was looking down at his desk

"Where... did you. send him" I whispered. He just continued to look down at his desk. I jumped on top of his desk grabbing his as well.

"Where. did. you. send. him" I growled

"He was in the rain village" Tsunade said as she grabbed my hands pulling me off of dad. I pulled my hand out of her grip and rushed out the door with my father yelling my name behind me. I ran with tears streaming down my face. I didn't know where I was going, but I was going somewhere. Alone. That's what I needed, Some alone time. Some time to think, but to think about what. Jiraiya. Asuma. Sasori. Deidara. So much death and all of it because of me

'It's all my fault' echoed through my head thinking back to the beginning of all of this death in the recent weeks. I ran until my breathing became to rough for me to continue. I slowed down tired from running and yelling in my dad's office, and It didn't help that my throat was closing up from the grief. I stopped and slumped up against a tree next to a clearing. As tears ran down my face, and I struggled to catch my breath. As I panted against the tree I glanced up and recognized where I was. My mind was soon flooded with memories of Jiraiya, and the wonderful times I spent with him.