The Coalition of Sierra J. Rubenstein

Beyond Simplicity:

    To save time on the brief contact we had with each other, I will sum up the next few conversations as Sierra trying to get me to come crawling back, but I turned her down again. She was preparing to leave Brandon until I shut her down. I did not want any part of her anymore. Sierra became pissed and payed me a visit not too long after. This was Sierra first and only visit to our apartment by herself. The last two times was accompanied by Mya and Sierra led me on like we were going to have sex until I saw Mya. Sierra came down to grab just a handful of her belongings again instead of taking a more significant. She pretty much came down to tell me off and that is the part I want to break down. Sierra tried to hurt my feeling when she called me out for being an ass. I interrupted her angry rant to ask her why she moved out to Salisbury if she was just going to leave me. She replied, "I stopped loving you the last three months we were together".
I thought on it after I did some quick math before speaking out again. "So what you are telling me, Sierra, is that you stopped loving me after Christmas. So the brat did not get what she wanted for Christmas, so she decided to end her relationship".
"Pretty much".
"You hear how terrible I made that sounded, right. That is because it is terrible and you fucking admit to it? I finally met someone who would do such a thing".
"I need someone that can support and your not willing to and I need to start looking out for myself".
"What do you mean start looking out for yourself? That's all you ever do. You ask so much from me to help you out and I do it. Matter of fact if you think on it, you fucking owe me. You owe my family after all we have done for you".
"I don't owe you shit. I don't owe anybody anything! All I do is help everyone else, goddamnit! When do I get to take care of myself"?
"All you are is a ragging bitch to everyone around you. I can't remember the last time you did something for anyone out of the kindness of your heart. Just so you can think on it, remember that you would not be here if it wasn't for the people that still choose to be in your life".
Sierra stormed out after that comment as she flipped me off and called me an ass. We left that conversation with us resenting one another. We were not on good terms. The next day, I paid Shelly a visit just so I could inform her about my current situation. Shelly had asked me the week prior to this visit by Sierra if everything was alright. Shelly noticed Sierra had not been around for awhile and wanted to know the situation. I told Shelly everything going on between Sierra and I. I then explained to Shelly that I believed I could get Sierra back at one point in all this, but I came to my senses and told her no. Since I came to Shelly first and was actually honest with her, Shelly believed me and was more on my side. What really helped my case was when Shelly tried to get Sierra's side, Sierra dodged all her calls. Guess Sierra's hard head came in handy for once and became the first step in Sierra's mistakes. I am going to spoil a bit of this brewing conflict and say that Sierra made many mistakes that ultimately screwed herself. She broke the golden rule Shelly gave us the day we signed the lease. Remember exactly what Sierra said to her just makes this situation mildly funny. Shelly and I had to wait on Sierra to see what she would do in this situation.
    I did not speak with Sierra until a few days later when Sierra called me up complaining how Shelly was "harassing" her by constantly blowing up her phone. I was being civil at this point and explained that our landlord wants to talk with her about what is going on. She is also under contract with Shelly, so it is not harassment, plus you did not say a word to her before leaving. Sierra chewed me out and yelled at me to yell at Shelly how Sierra will press charges if Shelly does not stop. Again I was calming explaining that she could not do that before she hung up on me. She called me an ass too, but the point is that I told Shelly this phone call. We both had a good laugh. Sierra's second mistake.
    Another few days later, Sierra sends me a series of bizarre text messages. I was getting the impression that Sierra was scheduling performances every few days when she would contact me. This time it was not Sierra in a fit of anger or flirting to get with me. The first few messages she sent me was summed up as Sierra not able to do "this" and "needs a way out". Her first three messages were out of complete nowhere. It was taking place mid day early in the week. I just got back from my classes when I saw the messages. I replied back asking if everything was ok which the response was a strong no. The next messages to follow was the ones I remember vividly, "I just want to scream in the face of the devil" and "I can't live with what I have done". I am still confused what she meant about the devil, but I did not need to understand it to know Sierra was trying to off herself again. I asked if she was at work and sure enough Sierra told me she was. Sierra was the only teacher in a room full of infants is what she was telling me. I started to freak out that this was going on at work. I began to frantically call Sierra over and over again just so I could talk some sense in her. Her coworkers did not know what was going on and I did not want them to find Sierra bleeding out in a room full of babies. Sierra finally picked up after my fourth call to her and she was pissed at me. "What the hell are you doing calling while I'm on shift"?
"What do you mean? You were the one who messaged me at work talking crazy and trying to commit suicide at work. You completely went silent on me and was about to call the police and your work about what was going on".
"I'm fine".
"Why would you message me that? I don't get why you were contacting me".
In a deep demonic voice, Sierra responded back saying: "I don't need you anymore, I have someone else now".
I am not exaggerating when I tell you, Sierra sounded possess when she said that last statement. I freaked out on how disturbing Sierra was that day. I felt like James Woods' character from the movie "Scary Movie 2". I was uncomfortably laughing after Sierra hung up on me. What was going through her mind to contact me if she has "someone else"? This was just an inappropriate conversation to have with your ex-boyfriend. This was what I was going through with Sierra. Even after we broke up, she still came to me when she had suicidal thoughts. I guess I could not get away from Sierra's crazy mess. Not being with her was just as complex, if not more, than when I was with Sierra.