Blake and Aimee

Chapter 53: Aimee

It's a nice day today. By "nice" I mean cloudy- completely overcast. There is a slight breeze as I wheel Blake down in his wheelchair to the parklands. I set up the picnic blanket and help Blake out of his chair. He sighs.

"What wrong?" He looks angry, most likely with himself.

"It's happening Aimee, I'm losing it." I shake my head.

"Blake you are not losing it, everyone needs help it's not a bad thing." He shakes his head now.

"But I can't even stand up by myself Aimee? Do you know what that feels like?" I look straight at him.

"No, I don't." I say matter-of-factly. "But I do know how to feed people soup. I have become an expert with toddlers from two-and-a-half upwards thanks to my baby cousin Edward and feeding you shall be no different." Blake laughs and shakes his head.

"No, nope not happening, sorry. I will not be treated like a baby."

"Would you prefer for me to treat you like an elderly man with back problems?" He looks at me and I start laughing. I cut out my attitude and talk to him normally.

"Blake your hands are too shaky, and besides I'm your girlfriend. I want to help you." He smirks.

"Girlfriends aren't meant to feed you soup like child, they meant to give you a good shag." He winks at me and I slap him on the shoulder.

"Well I've done that already haven't I? Now eat."

...

Once he finished his soup, we both lay down on the blanket, looking at the sky above. I look over at him. His eyes are red and swollen, his lips are white and cracked. He frowns.

"What, why are you staring at me?" I kiss him, as I stroke his face.

"You're beautiful." He shakes his head and rolls onto his back. "You are..." He stares straight up at the sky, I can see his eyes are welling up with tears. It hurts me to see him like this. All this self-loathing, but I don't care what he thinks. He is beautiful. To me, and his family, his friends. We all love him, even if he can't find the willpower or the strength to love himself. I turn my head to him.

"Do I need to sing James Blunt?" His neck snaps at me, he looks disturbed.

"Dear God, no!" I smile. Too late.

"You're beautiful! You're beautiful!" Blake groans.

"Urgh make it stop." He covers his ears with his hands.

"YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL IT'S TRUE!" He laughs at me, shaking his head from side to side as if trying to block out the horror. "I saw your face in a crowded place!" I stop laughing, my hand laces with his as I finish singing. "And I don't know what to do," I look over at him, I feel my smile fading as I try to keep back the tears, "'Cause I'll never be with you..." He looks up at me and strokes my hair. He whispers softly.

"Don't be like that." I look down at our hands. He pulls my chin up to face him. "You have me, don't you? We've had good times, right?" I nod and smile, but I can't stop the tears from falling down my face.

"I love you Blake."

"I love you too Aimee, because I'm yours. Whether it be fate or God or Santa Claus, from the moment I saw your face on that cursed period 1 English lesson, I was yours." I kiss forehead. He smiles at me.

"Now listen to me, you are going to have an amazing life Aimee. God! You are going to do so much, make plans, go places. You are going to have an adventure so big, it will make up for the fact I don't get to live mine." I start crying.

"You deserve an adventure." He smiles, tears stream down his cheeks onto the blanket.

"You are my adventure Aimee, never have I felt so alive than when I'm with you. I hope all your days feel the same way mine do when I'm with you." We spend some time there, laying on the picnic blanket, gazing at the sky. It's so endless, an expanse of nothing and everything all at once. It makes you realise how fleeting human life really is. Millions of years have been and gone but this is, and always will be, the same sky. There is something both reassuring and unsettling about it.