The Undead

Chapter 16: Confession

I felt myself slip off the roof. I hear the shout. I throw my hand up and feel another hand grab me. "Noooo!" Stevie shouts. The sweaty hand is slipping. I snap back and see Stevie holding me from the roof. "You won't survive the fall" He says. "We're slipping" I say back. The grip tightens but the sweat isnt helping the cause.I swing myself towards the window and kick a hole in it. "Stevie swing me....I'll go through the window. Trust me" I say. He and I work to swing me backwards and then forwards. I let go and fly into the window and feel glass rip through my skin. I roll on the floor. I pick out the glass. I check for major wounds. I am bleeding allover but I feel the sharpest pain in my left thigh.  I look and spot I decent shard lodged in it. I rip it out. I feel blood soak through my jeans. I see a dangling weapon. I grab it from Stevie. "Thanks" I call to him.

I join Phillip at the front of the assault. He is surrounded by blood. I spray next to him. I stand and we back to back annihalate walkers. Stevie covers us when we reload. "Come with me" I shout to Phillip over the gunshots. He follows me as we run to the camp site. I see the others. "There...there about gone. Get with the others" I say to Phillip. I run back for Stevie. I get him off the roof and we arrive at the camp with the others. "Let the walkers fall to our trench.....I want to see how this works." I explain.  Several minutes pass before I spot a walker step onto the sand.He runs after us and falls into the trench. The others do too. Blood trickles out from the shards of glass pricking their feet. Then I remember my wounds. 

"We need first aid" I say to Stevie. He runs for it and I take my Jeans off and sit in my boxers on the warm sand. The cut is deep. I look at my scar. Its amazing to know I have this scar. It  makes me feel like a video game character with a shitty-but-somehow-interesting backstory. Kelly applies pressure and alcohol to the wound and Stevie gives me stitches. I decide to stay less mobile for a few days. I Walk to the bridge and lower it down. "Sup...undead bitches" I say to the prisoners below us. They see me and try to maul me but their efforts fall short. I throw some sand in ones eyes and it gets pissed. It attacks the walker next to it. "Holy..shit...You arent supposed to do that" I say aloud. "What?"

"The walkers attack eachother when pissed. I threw sand and it attacked the other. It didn't kill it but....it's weird" I answer Cole. I decide to walk around and search for useful items. I take the dog with me. "Sniff out some objects for me boy!" I say to furball.

He takes off and I jog behind him. I look around as I run and spot a truck. Furball is already clawing at the door. I bash the window in. A cache of shotgun shells and a double barrel lay there. I loot it and look in the bed of the truck. Three fishing poles. It is something.  I grab them and return to camp. The others sitting around eating stale chips. "I hope you guys like fish" I say as Andrew lets the bridge down. "woah....fishing rods!" Andrew exclaims. "Yeah found'em in a truck along with my new weapon" I say. I give one to Andrew and one to Stevie. They go off and look for worms in the dirt close by.

I join them. "Furball.....dig boy!" I command. He ensues dig mode as I walk around. The others find bait and I find walkers. I swing my axe into them. I chop them up as the others call me over. "Who's ready to fish?" Stevie asks. "Ughhh....I'll join ya" I hear Andrew say. I decide to join also.

The day rolls by with some catches. We make a meal for all with our days worth. I hope tomorrow'll be better. I decide to patrol around tonight. Jillian joins me. We talk. "I think Melanie is trying to steal you...she talks about you and then stops when I roll around" She explains. "C'mon Mel and I have history...maybe she stops because she doesnt feel comfortable with you. She is my ex." I say. "Did you and her have anything before I showed up?" She asks. I pause.

I keep walking and she asks again. "Babe?" she says again. I decide to tell her. " We....kinda did 'it' before....." I whisper.

She stops walking. "I'm gonna go" she says. I turn to stop her but shes gone. I sit in the sand listening to the waves crash. I knew I shouldn't of told her. I walk some more before turning back for camp. When I get back Jillian isnt there. "Just ignore it man.....shes probably not far" I war with myself. "You can't just leave her dude" Phillip whispers. I look him in the eye. "Find her" He says to me.

I walk over and follow footsteps. "Jillian!!!" I shout out. No response. I see a blood stain in the sand. I fill with worry. I start to run against her footsteps. "Jillian!" I cry out. Worried, I slip my double barrel out. The sand is heavily stained with fresh blood. I run faster. I find a walker body. I kick it and it swings at me. I spray its brains with both barrels. I keep running. I see a person standing in the moonlight.

"Jillian?" I ask. The body spins. The face is recognizable. "No.....No.....Damnit!" I shout. Tears stroll down my face. This isnt happening. Why did you...why did you leave my safety I think.

"Why did I fail to do the only job I was given?" I ask myself. "Jillian..... I love you. Why didn't I get you the moment you left?" I ask her. "Kaleb......I love you too. It's my fault." She says. "Why did you have to walk away!?" I shout at her. I drop to my knees. "Baby....Im sorry...." She whispers.

I bottle my feelings. I stand. I switch into survival mode. "Its for survival....I'll miss you." I say as I place the shells into the barrel. I lift my gun and spray the shells into her body. Leaving nothing but two holes in her head and chest. I step back. "Kaleb....." Stevie says. I just look him in the eye. "It's my fault, I let her walk away.....But it is over. Shes gone" I say to him. "You did what you had to......" He replies. I walk with him. I hold back tears and screams. I sit down next to Stevie. He returns to sleep. I get up and move over to Ryan who sleeps alone. I lay next to him and sleep.  I wake up to Stevie and Andrew. "We got some fishes to catch bro" Andrew says.  We all take to our rods and fish away.

By lunchtime everyone is asking for Jillian. I gather them around. "She got upset....she walked away from me and I didnt make the effort to get her. After finally looking I found her. She was bit and bleeding heavily. I couldn't handle it so I out her out of her misery. We must learn to prepare for losses at any moment" I explain. They all handle it differently.

I return to fishing. I hear shouts behind me. They're arguing about me and my mental state. They're arguing with Stevie. He's the only one trying to defend me. They call me crazy. Thats when I snap.

I rush back to camp. I look them all in the eye. One by one they jusge me. Phillip has joined Stevie in efforts to defend me. Ryan stands there. "Ryan...come with me bud...we're leaving." I tell him. I take his hand and grab our stuff and two tents. "Who is coming with?" I ask. Stevie joins....then Phillip....and just as we board the helicopter, Melanie.

I start it up and Furball is held back by Kelly. Who is in tears from Stevies departure. "We might come back. We might not. But Im not staying with people who cant trust me." I say to them. Britni lets Andrews hand go before grabbing her stuff and taking a seat by Melanie.

"Goodluck" I wave goodbye and take off. No remorse.

Not knowing when and if, I'll return. I'm leaving so much behind. I head for California. "Phillip.... You still know how to fly a plane?" I ask him. "Yes...why?"