They say it gets better and I want to believe that. I have fought with depression for so many years I hardly remember before I had it anymore. Yes there are times when I don't feel like blowing my head off. But time after time the feeling comes back. It seems to be my brain's "go to" thought whenever I'm even the slightest bit upset. I have tried depression medication.... Many kinds.... But they don't seem to do anything for me but make me a tired zombie. I stopped trying to find one that works about two years ago.
My family can't grasp why I feel the way I do, Heck I don't know why I feel this way half of the time. People without depression just can't understand. They think they must be doing something wrong and feels upset when I talk about how I feel, so I have just stopped talking to them about it. Why upset them over and over again.
Well like I said I do have some good days and while I'm having a bad one I try and tell myself it will get better. I will feel ok again. But for how long do I have to keep saying this to myself. How many times will the depression rear it's ugly head over and over again. I'm tired, so tired. I just want to know that the light at the end of the tunnel isn't a train.
Does anyone feel the same way. Or am I totally alone in this
YOU ARE READING
The things I think of when I'm alone
PoesíaUnbearable pain that is expressed and acknowledged becomes bearable. But people who have suffered from BPD received no such responses in their childhood. Therefore, they are stuck in the past, trying to elicit what they needed as a child-validation...
