The Definition of Fate

Chapter 38

We laid in bed

and watched the clocks

around us dance
until time to us,
was only the rise
and fall of our
ruptured heartbeats.
We kissed and we kissed

until we no longer understood

the pattern of a day as

we fell in love with the

colors and the world

between each other's
eyelids.

- Christopher Poindexter

"So how worried do I need to be?" Josh asks as we begin the six hour drive home the Wednesday before Thanksgiving in his Jeep.

Despite my protests, Josh insisted on wearing a tucked in button-up shirt and dress pants even though he never wears that kind of clothing any other day. He shaved, pressed his clothes, got a haircut, and tried to look as professional as possible. I told him Mom and Dad won't care about his clothing, but he's stressed about making a good second impression and honestly, it's kind of cute.

"Dad will be fine. He trusts my judgment. All he wants is for me to be happy, and you make me happy. He knows that. As long as you tell him the truth and don't downplay what happened with us before, you'll be fine." I reach across the console to squeeze Josh's hand where it tightly grips the steering wheel, his scarred knuckles flushed white.

"What about your mom?"

"Well..." I contemplate mincing words. "She kinda hates you."

Josh winces. "Great."

"I mean, can you blame her?" I say. Even though Mom's over-protective streak drives me crazy, I'd probably act the same way if my daughter got back with the guy who destroyed her. "If some guy you only met twice broke Ellie's heart, would you welcome him back with open arms?"

Josh's frown deepens, displaying the new wrinkles between his eyes. "I'd kill him."

"I'm going to assume you mean that figuratively. But that's how Mom feels. She won't kill you, but she might give you a hard time. She doesn't think I should have moved to Columbus at all. She wanted me to marry Aaron and move to Massachusetts with him."
"Do you regret moving here?" Josh says, risking a glance in my direction.

"Not for a second. I mean, life's not perfect, but you're here." I shrug. "And we're kinda perfect right now."
Josh grins at me and we ride in silence for a while. As we leave Columbus, the city fades behind us and forests of red, orange, and yellow replace it. Leaves whistle across the highway and I imagine their crackle underfoot. Autumn is a season of change, and Josh and I are transitioning as well. Only a few months ago, we went on our first date thanks to Ellie's intervention. Now he's joining my family for Thanksgiving and I'm contemplating a future that goes beyond this month or even this year.

"I'm glad we're doing things right this time," Josh murmurs. "Last time, we were all out of order. Well, I was. I screwed up because I didn't know what I wanted. But now, this is right."

I bite my lip as I think about how quickly we've been moving. Josh said this is what he wants, but doubts still creep in. "You aren't...it doesn't scare you, does it? You and me?"
"Scare me?" Josh's brow wrinkles and his lips quirk. "The only thing that scares me is something going wrong with us. I mean, I've never...this is as serious as any relationship has ever been for me, but I'm not scared, not like I have been before. We're right, Rach, you and me."