"Did you know about this?" I snapped at Rebbie as he got closer.
"First babe lets calm ourselves." She replies.
"Please don't tell me to calm down Rebbie. Did you know he was coming?"
"No, I promise you I had no part in him being here." She assured me and took LaToya by the arm, pulling her to the side. They began to bicker over by the door.
Rene stopped a few feet away from me. My chest felt tight making it hard to breathe. He looked like shit. Like he hadn't slept or eaten for days. He looked pitiful. I almost felt sorry for him... almost.
He took a step forward and I quickly stepped back, my hands out in front of me. "Don't ." I said.
"Can we please just talk?" He said. "I brought these for you. I know they're your favorite."
I turned up my nose at him. "You think bringing flowers is going to erase everything you've done to me?" I said.
"No, honey not at all." He said and kneeled to his knees. He raised his eyes and looked at me. They were red and swollen. He looked hadn't shaved or had a hair cut in weeks. He held the flowers out to me.
I hesitated but walked towards him and cautiously took them from his hands. But as I looked down at him flashbacks of the horrible things he'd done washed over me. My breathing was rapid and I thought my heart would beat out of my chest. I threw the flowers in face. He flinched and just kept his gaze.
"I deserve it." He said and started to cry.
"Fuck you Rene! You don't get to do that." I said pointing at him and pacing. "You come here looking like a fucking charity case, wanting the whole world to feel sorry for you. Well I DON'T!" I yelled in his face. Tears streamed down my cheeks now. "You promised to protect me." I cried. "And you're the one I need protection from." I looked at him and shook my head. "I don't know why you came here today. Just go." I said.
He was sobbing on the ground beneath me, both hands on the pavement. I kicked the flowers across the concrete and turned to walk away.
"Do you remember the very first day we met?" He said. I stopped and turned to face him. He smiled slightly . "I'd never seen someone be as quiet as a mouse and have such a demanding presence. I never told you this but I was a fan of you before we even met. I'd always hoped, since I had the opportunity to work with your sister, that I'd meet you one day." My eyes followed him as he stood to his feet. "I was so nervous the day you walked in the studio. I couldn't take my eyes off of you and thought I'd peel over and die because my heart was pounding so fast." He looked back at LaToya who giggled. "Everyone in the room knew except you. I remember you came and sat right behind me. My focus was already off that day and I kept missing steps." He paused for a moment. "You're sister had told me multiple times that if the choreography was too hard for me, she would have to find someone else. But you," He said, "you saw me struggling, you saw me on the verge of giving up and for whatever reason, you also saw something in me. You knew that with a little help I could do it." He and I both glanced at LaToya as she approached us.
"I remember that. We didn't think he was going to get it but you pulled me to the side and begged me to let you help him. You knew he could do it." She said and hooked her arm into mine.
Rene continued. "You took me into one the conference rooms and went through each step with me. With in 20 minutes, I had it down." He said. "You saved me. I'd given up everything for that job and I saw it slipping through my fingers but you believed in me. It made me believe in myself."
My tears just would not stop coming. "So what Rene, none of this means anything to me and I can't save you this time." I said.
"I'm not asking you to. I'm asking you to just believe in me one more time." He said. "Janet I don't know who I am anymore. With the drugs and alcohol, most days I don't even know where I am. But I'm getting help. I'm leaving straight from here and checking myself into a rehab facility." He said. "I know that I can do this, but I don't want to do this without you."
I glanced at Rebbie, looking for an answer but I knew she couldn't make this decision for me. I was feeling overwhelmed and needed time to think. All eyes were on me.
Tires screeched against the pavement and a car pulled up next to us. It was Preston. He jumped out of the car, stormed up to us and pushed Rene causing him to stubble and fall.
"I warned you didn't I!" Preston yelled, grabbing him up by the shirt and punching him square in the face.
"Preston please. He is just here to talk." I said. I held my hand to his chest. "Let's go."
I turned to look at my sisters. They were horrified and didn't know what to say or do. LaToya helped Rene to his feet. "I know you're protecting from her me. I thank you for that." He said.
"Say another word." Preston said. I'd never seen him so angry.
"Preston!" I said and looked around. We were beginning to draw a crowd. "We need to go now." I looked at my sisters and then just Rebbie. She knew that there was something she was missing to this story. I would just have to call her later, but right now, we needed to go before the paparazzi start to show up. Preston held my door open and we quickly pulled away. I gazed out the back window watching the three of them standing there, fading in the distance as we pulled off towards the highway and headed for Shawn's place.
