stoic

Chapter 44

"Please Mackenzie." He took my hand as I tried to walk away. I snatched my hand back looking at him.

"Why would you ruin something so good?" I ask him, walking away from him but he just followed as we made it outside. "You don't push your girlfriend away then go to a party and hook up with someone a few hours after."

"I thought she was you and it was only a kiss."

"Great." I throw my hands up in frustration, "only a kiss. That's fine! It was only a fucking kiss. How about I go kiss Alfie from calc, he looks like you." I roll my eyes.

"I was mad because my dad was at the game." He says quietly, "I wanted to impress him. I thought you were at the party because you never miss those types of parties. I was drunk Mackenzie you've got to believe me."

"Drunk or not, that doesn't give you an excuse."

"What am I supposed to say?" He shouts back, obviously tired with this conversation like I was.

"Nothing." I shout, "just don't say anything. I'm going home." I mumble, walking off.

"What?" He steps in front of me, "no let's talk this out."

I sighed, looking at the floor then back up to him.

"We've been through so much Kenz. Please believe me when I say I thought she was you, I was so intoxicated. I'd never willingly cheat on you, never in a million years. I'm so sorry." He was now standing right infront of me.

"Okay." I say.

"Okay what?" He says with his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Okay, I believe you." I say and he lets out a sigh. "But that doesn't mean what you did was ok. I just this isn't worth fighting about right now." 

I wanted to talk about the game with Ryder and about his dad. I didn't want to fight, that was the last thing I wanted to do but there was still something inside of me which still felt vulnerable and betrayed. I pushed that feeling to one side and sighed.

"You still hurt me Ryder."

"I know baby I'm so sorry." He wrapped his arms around me and engulfed me in a hug, his head dipping down into my neck.

"Who's the girl?" I ask grumpily, hugging back.

"I don't know." His breath fanning against the skin of my neck and I inhaled sharply, pulling away slightly to reach up and cup his jaw so that he could look at me.

"I swear to God Ryder. If you do that again i'm not going to give you another chance-"

"And I won't I promise." He says with confidence which filled me with certainty.

"Good," I kiss him gently, my lips lingering over his for a second before the bell rang.

"Skip with me?" He asks and I think about it for a second.

"I have to go to lessons or I won't get this scholarship." I tell him and I he nods understandingly. "But meet me by my locker at the end of school?"

"Ok."

***

At lunch I had cheer practice and I told Ella and Jerry everything that went down between Ryder and I. They said that I did the right thing in forgiving him but that I still needed to be careful. This wasn't something I was going to tell Tim but Molly probably told him seeing as the whole ass school knew.

In Math we had a quiz which I did alright in. I needed to start studying more or else I was screwed for college.

From Lindsay:  I have a problem

To Lindsay: Where are you?

From Lindsay: In the girls toilet. I need you now.

It was last period and I hadn't seen Lindsay all day or the past few days for that matter.

I was excused from the lesson and I headed straight to the toilets. "Lindsay?" I say as I watch her look at herself in the mirror, breathing heavily, her eyes glossy. "What's wrong?"

She looks at me then breaks down. I comfort her for a second before she pulls away from the hug and I see what's in her hand. "Linds... that's.. that's not a pregnancy test is it?"