he is my medicine.
he is the only medicine that helps me nowadays.
but i started a new medication.
an antidepressant.
it seems to help,
but not in all places.
it fills the gap that the mood stabilizers fail to fill,
and accompanies the adderall well,
it cozies up with the ativan,
and it mixes well with the medley i already take.
but him...
he fills the gap.
he never fails to make me feel better when the medicine fails me.
i recently cut my hair.
i dyed it, too.
i'm trying to become a new person.
i am a different person than i was when i was with them.
i won't address them as "you" anymore.
i'm over that.
i'm getting over them, finally.
because he is my medicine,
and the words "blue lemonade" don't mean anything to me anymore.
i've come to terms with being single.
it's hard when i haven't been single for so long,
but it's almost refreshing.
i still wish i could find someone new,
but for now,
all i need is him.
he is my medicine.
he is what they failed to be for me, even when i was too blind to notice it.
if they are reading this,
i would like to wish them a happy night.
i hope they never read my stories ever again.
one for one:
if i stop obsessing over them,
they should stop as well.
so this is a farewell
to the one i once loved.
i will be with him
and he will heal the wounds
as medicine should.
YOU ARE READING
everything changes (but we all stay the same)
Poésieif my life could be replayed, if i could share my struggles over the course of time, if i could create such a thing, an endless recording of my life; it would be over hours and hours of overthinking. - (trigger warning for frequent, graphic descr...
