BCS 3: Innocent Mistake

Chapter 35

This story contains violence, aggression, abuse, prolonged torture, romanticized rape, profane languages, suicide, and murder.

~Camp~

Dreaded and exhausted from all the things that the King is shown to me, I let him guide me back to the palace.

Mugto ang aking mga mata at gulong-gulo ang aking isip. There's a part of me that lessens the feelings I had after my long cry but the idea of the King's sister is still haunted onto me.

Nilingon ako ng Hari, kinagat ko ang aking ibang labi nang huminto siya at tinitigan ako ng mabuti. We are still far from the palace.

My legs are hurting from the long walk we have with the King and I also feel exhausted.

Gusto ko na lamang bumalik sa silid at matulog. But somehow I don't understand why I still in relief with me being here with the King.

Why did he let me see all the things he knew. Can I visit my child again and offer my unborn child a flower and a visit?

"Y-your s-sister-"

Kaagad kong naitikom ang mga labi sa kaagad niyang pag-iling. The dismissal of the subject in his eyes convinced me to keep my lips shut as he gently holds my elbows and went to me closer.

Tumingala ako lalo sa kaniya at nakita ang pag dila niya sa ibabang labi. His jaw started covering fine stubble.

Worry is in my eyes as I waited for him to speak. For him to be angry or whatever he usually does. The thing he usually does that I used to it already ever since I first met him.

"Do you know why I let you see all of those, Zemira? Because I want you to know what were my pasts looks like. I want you to know that all those people in my past will be only memories now. My sister is all that I had..."

Napalunok siya at dinama ng isa niyang palad ang aking pisngi.

"I feel so lost when she died. But it doesn't make sense to me now. I fucking do not care now, Zemira as long as I have you."

Hindi ko alam kung bakit sa mga salita lamang ng Hari ay tila ramdam ko ang pighati niya.

I do not like the King after I knew that my child had gone. Huli ko na ring napagtantong hindi ko lamang anak iyon.

The King is the father of my child and I just deny his right on our supposed to be children.

I thought that the King is just so bad. Na akala ko ay nagkamali lamang ako sa sinabi kong mabuti siya noon.

Somehow I have weird questions that keep on bugging in my head.

Why does my heart ache for him? Why does my heart beats so fast when I always think about him? Why do I found myself so comfortable with his side even if I know that he caused anger and fear to everyone?

Sa aking unti-unting pagtanto ng mga bagay tungkol sa Hari ay mas lalo ring bumibigat ang aking dibdib.

The King is the only person who let me here in his palace. Give me food and everything I needed. He gives me a comfortable bed to sleep in. He let me share his chamber.

I never really remembered when did he hit me. The King never hit me! He never did!

Muling pumatak ang masaganang luha sa aking mga mata.

"I-I'm sorry," I said between my little sobs, I almost choke.

Nakita ko ang pag-igting ng kaniyang panga at ang pagyuko niya pa upang magtagpo ang aming labi.