Life Unexpected (The Urie's Daughter Series Book 4)

Room To Breathe

TRIGGER WARNING: Suicide please use caution reading this chapter. If needed skip over this chapter. Keep yourselves safe. The first half is okay, I'll mark where to stop reading if you need to.

Ryleigh
I woke up in my own bed. Dad was sitting next to me. I didn't remember much about how I got there. "Hey, baby girl,"Dad said and moved a strand of hair out of my face when he felt me stir. "What happened?"I asked as I sat up slowly. "You blacked out. We went by the hospital. The baby is fine. You got too stressed and you were really dehydrated,"Dad said. I nodded to show I understood.

"We need to talk,"he said. I looked down at the floor. "Who's the father and when did this happen?"he asked. I stared out the window at the winter sky. I missed the December snow. Christmas was coming quickly. "At Alex's wedding. Please don't be mad,"I said. "I'm not, Ry. I couldn't be mad at you ever,"he said. "It's Zack,"I mumbled. His eyes grew wide.

"Dad, what do I do? I'm scared,"I asked after a few minutes silent. "I can't tell you what to do with your body. What happened, happened. This is your choice,"he said. "But I need your help,"I said. "Ryleigh, you need to talk with your mother about this one,"he said and hugged me. I got up and walked downstairs. Mom was coming down the hallway. Maddie must be napping. "Hey, can we talk?"I asked. "Sure thing, baby. How about some fresh air, too?"Mom said and led me down the hallway to the back door.

I hugged my arms around my stomach. It was about 50 degrees today, a low for LA. I breathed in the cold air. We took a seat on the patio chairs overlooking the pool. "What's up?"she asked. "I don't know what to do,"I said, putting my face in my hands. "That's up to you. There are options. You can get an abortion or let someone adopt the baby or you can keep it,"Mom said. "But, Mom, I'm scared. Tell me what to do,"I said, looking at her.

"I can't. This isn't my call and it isn't my body,"she said. She stood and kissed my forehead, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I had a war in my mind. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't imagine giving the baby up but I also wasn't sure I was ready to be a mom.

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"Hey, dad, what are we doing for Christmas?"I asked as I entered the kitchen for a water bottle. "I dunno,"he answered. "Well, it's in a couple days. What if we have everyone over?"I asked, giving him puppy eyes. "Fine. I'll see who's around,"He replied. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"I said, hugging him. I had gotten my license a few months ago so, after asking permission, I borrowed the Tesla. I wanted to get Christmas gifts for everyone so I did. I went to the mall.

"Ryleigh Urie?"someone asked. I froze looking around, I figured it was some fan wanting a picture. I didn't expect to be met with a familiar face. "Adam?"I asked. "How are you?"He asked, going for a hug but not receiving one. I didn't know what to say. I was shocked and I couldn't get that night he was violent with Zack out of my mind.

"I miss you,"He said. "Yeah, me too,"I said. When he didn't make any effort to move, I spoke up. "What do you want exactly, Adam?"I asked. "You. I want us back. I've missed it. My parents just got a divorce,"He said, teary eyed. "Oh no. I'm so sorry. I had no idea but we can't happen. We can be friends but that's it. I need some space,"I said. "Why? Are you afraid of me because I tried to fight some asshole touching my girlfriend?"He asked. This pissed me off. "No, Adam. It's more complicated than that,"I said. "Really? Then what is it?"He spat. "You really want to know. I'm pregnant,"I said. That shut him up.

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"I don't care about that. I'll love them like my own. I want to be with you,"he said. I shook my head no and started to walk away. He muttered something similar to you should've just ended it. I felt my tears welling. If only he knew how hard I've tried. "You'll regret this!"he yelled after me. I went home and took the presents to my room. I didn't speak a word to anyone. I crawled into my bed and hugged a pillow as tears spilled down my face and I traced every single scar on my arms.

I must've cried myself to sleep. It was three in the morning when Dad came in. "Ryleigh, are you awake?"he asked, sitting on the edge of my bed. I rolled over and squinted at him. "Oh, honey,"he said. I heard tears in his voice. "Dad? Dad, what's wrong?"I asked frantically and turned on a small lamp beside my bed. "Your friend, Adam. He's gone, Ryles,"he said, using Justin and Sleeping's nickname for me. "What? What do you mean?"I asked, my voice breaking.

"He's gone, Ryleigh. His mom just called. She found him an hour ago on his bathroom floor, the note was on his counter. He killed himself,"Dad said sadly and softly. I could see the care in his eyes as I pulled my knees up and started sobbing uncontrollably. Dad undid my tiny ball and pulled me onto his lap.

He hugged me tight and whispered in my ear as he rocked me back and forth, letting me cry into his chest. I was worried about waking Maddie but I couldn't stop. It was all my fault, if only I hadn't walked away. If I would've stayed with him or talked things out then maybe he would still be alive. "It's---all--m--my--fault,"I sobbed. "No, Ryleigh, no. It was his choice,"Dad tried to explain. I felt so guilty, it was bearing down on my chest. Dad started singing and I clung to his chest until I passed out, no more tears left in my body.