Cael was quiet the whole drive. I felt kinda guilty and not guilty at the same time. I don't know why he's putting an effort into helping me cope with everything I'm going through well in fact I never asked for anyone's help. Especially his.
I was enjoying the tranquillity the scenery was offering me as the trees passed by in a flash. How long has it been since I went out and just relaxed? Ever since Marcus was buried, my routine was house-therapy-house-therapy-house and then after some time, it was house-work-therapy-house-work-therapy.
I forgot how to live ever since he was gone.
I almost laugh at the thought. When they decided to cut Marcus' life support, I already knew my life was over too.
I was deep in thought, all containing Marcus, when I realized that we've been in the road for almost an hour. If my memory serves me right, Arjay already informed me that the lot is just 15-20 minutes away, 35 including traffic.
I looked at Cael and caught him stealing glances at me. I think he's been doing it ever since we got on the road.
"Bakit parang ang tagal natin?" I finally dared to ask.
He just shrugged his shoulders and relaxed against the driver's seat. "We can forget about the project for now." Sagot niya, na halatang malayo sa katanungan ko.
"Bakit parang ang tagal natin?" Muling ulit ko.
I saw him grinning before shaking his head in amusement. "You're not letting go of this one, aren't you?"
I shook my head for a reply. I heard him snicker, "Well, this is the first time I saw you relax with me after our incidents before you decided to take an indefinite leave."
"Your shoulders aren't tensed up but they hanged loosely down, your breathing is steady and slower, and even if your mouth isn't curling up for a smile I know you're having a good time because the happy creases at the side of your eyes are visible. So I took a chance and made the trip to the site a road trip instead."
With all that he said, my mind got stuck wbuilding then he mentioned the time I gave into him. The time I cheated on Marcus while he was in a coma.
And in that very moment, anger fuelled me more. I got mad at Cael, but angrier at myself.
I always knew subconsciously that Mama Belen will eventually cut Marcus' life support, she's been dropping hints here and there but I didn't listen. Instead, I took advantage of the situation and played fire with Cael all the way Marcus was stuck in the hospital fighting for whatever's left in his life.
I clenched my fist against the soft fabric of the dress I'm wearing. Suddenly, the cool and mellow atmosphere of the car started to choke me into tears.
"Dalhin mo na ako sa site." I stated firmly, tyring so hard to control my emotions as my eyes begin to become hazy with my unshed tears.
Hindi siya sumagot. Basta minaneobra na niya agad ang sasakyan niya papunta sa loteng dapat naman naming pupuntahan on the first place.
Kung gaano kami katagal sa daan kanina, ay siya naming bilis ng pagdating namin doon.
Walang anu-ano ay bumaba ako agad sa sasakyan at kunwaring nagmumuni-muni sa bakanteng loteng hindi ko alam kung para saan.
Maya maya ay naramdaman at narinig ko na ang maiingay na yapak ng sapatos ni Cael papalapit sa akin. Hangga't sa nasa silong na ako ng payong.
"Mainit, Isma. Huwag kang mag-sun bathing hindi ka nag sun block." He kid, but I remained silent.
"Para saan ba itong building na itatayo niyo?" Tanong ko sa kanya, in attempt to change the topic.
He looked at me bewildered like I told him the world's greatest secret. "You're telling me that you haven't read the file Arjay gave you?" He acted exxagerately shocked. "Who are you and what did you do to Emerald Charisma Vinluan?"
I smacked him in the chest before I rolled my eyes at him. All I heard was a chuckle in reply. "Busy ako kahapon kaya wala akong oras magbasa. Kahapon lang naman na-endorse sa akin 'to."
Busy akong makipag-usap sa therapist ko.
"Alam ko dahil kahapon ka lang naman pumasok."
"Alam mo pala bakit parang gulat ka pa diyan?"
Nag-kibit balikat lang siya habang nakatanaw sa harapan namin. Wala naman kaming ibang nakikita kundi lupa, bato, at mga dumi.
"Well, if you are in your zone. Or should I say, the well sought Architect Miss Era Vinluan, by now may plano ka na rito. Siguro mga dalawa o tatlo. Nakagawa ka na ng binder na naglalaman ng mga pwedeng itanong sa'yo sa unang presentation. Tapos pagkatapos nitong bisitang ito, magsisimula ka ng gumuhit ng sketches mo sa ano bang gusto mong maging itsura ng project na 'to. And the list goes on." He said with a genuine smile.
For a moment there my cold heart sparked. Warmth flooded my system for a few seconds before it got swallowed again by the emptiness that's filling me.
"Nakakamiss siya 'no?" Bulong ko.
"It's okay to miss him, Isma. That's normal."
I shook my head. "No, I mean me. I miss the old me before this." I said with a gesture.
"Well, I kinda miss her too." Then he paused to look at me intently in the eyes. I don't knowwhat I saw but I felt shivers creeping up my spine. "But she'll be back soon because I won't stop until I get her back." Another pause. "Miene."
BINABASA MO ANG
Stonehearts 5: Emerald
Romance| COMPLETED | 30 March 2017 - 27 June 2019 | Stonehearts Series #5 | Just like how her birthstone is coveted by royalty, Emerald Charisma Vinluan is yearned for by people because of her excellence in her field of work. This darling girl who has the...