Reality || L.H.

Chapter 11

Ashton pulls up to our apartment and Luke quickly gets out, slamming the door shut behind him. I wince, my throat closing up as I whisper, "Could you wait for me? I have to get a few things."

"Yeah, of course," he says in a soft voice.

Michael looks at me sympathetically and Calum reaches over to squeeze my shoulder comfortingly. I love them endlessly, but I just wish they would stop. I just want to pretend that none of this is happening, that the love of my life didn't just break up with me in a Chick-Fil-A parking lot and kick me out of the apartment.

I make my way up the stairs, sniveling pathetically. I wrap my arms around my stomach and hug myself tightly, telling myself that this is all just a dream. None of this is real. It's all in my imagination.

Fumbling for my key, I unlock the front door and head down the hallway for possibly the last time. I yank open the drawers of the dresser, throwing my clothes into a small bag. A tear rolls down my cheek even though I told myself I wouldn't cry until I was alone.

"You can get the rest of your stuff later," Luke says in a cool, distant voice as he leans against the doorway.

I try not to look at him as I nod, wiping away any tears that had fallen without my notice, slinging my bag over my shoulder. Luke steps aside to allow me to pass through the doorway, remaining completely silent. My shoulder just barely brushes his arm and I want to scream or burst into tears.

Somehow I manage to make it back down stairs where Ashton is waiting to take me to my parents' house. I hop in the front seat, just wanting a moment to myself. The second the door closes I put my head in my hands and start sobbing, unable to hold myself together any longer. They're loud, ugly sobs but I find that I don't care. It's like I lost my ability to care when Luke dumped me.

Ashton puts a reassuring hand on my back, trying to soothe me. None of them push me for information. They all know why I'm not staying at the apartment, why I've been crying ever since we left Chick-Fil-A.

"You want me to take you to your parents house?" Ash asks softly.

I nod, unable to speak.

Michael tries to crack a few jokes from the backseat in an effort to get me to smile, but Calum shakes his head at him to tell him to stop. We pull up to my parents' house and I get out, shouldering my little bag.

"Call us if you need anything," Calum says as I walk up to the front door.

I nod, but I don't feel like I'll get around to it. How can this ever feel better when I feel like someone just ripped my heart out of my chest? I feel empty and everything hurts so much. Luke should be walking beside me, an arm around my waist. He should be smiling down at me as he makes some stupid joke. Instead I'm walking alone, wondering what I did to make him fall out of love with me.

My mom flings open the door before I can even knock, looking at me with sympathy and surprise. "Oh, honey," she says when she sees my face. "Come here."

I throw myself into her arms, crying loud enough for the neighbors to hear me. My mom should make things better like she always does, but I really only want Luke back. She herds me inside and I let her. I'm too heartbroken to care.

***
Luke's POV

As soon as the door swung shut behind Kat, I can't hold it in anymore. I turn and knock a book off of the kitchen table. Curse that son of a bitch Blake. How could he just come back after what he did and expect Kat to forgive him? And it was obvious that she would go back to him. No one ever chose me if they had another option. Celeste certainly didn't.

More than Blake, I'm angry at myself. What was so wrong with me that people found me so hard to love? Everything had been going my way. I'd finally gotten the girl, the only girl I want. But of course I wouldn't be able to hold onto her, not with my luck.

I whirl and slam my hand into the wall. I cry out in pain as I hear the bones in my hand break with the force of the impact. I wish that Kat was here to fuss over me. I wish that I could fall asleep with her in my arms, wake up beside her. But I'd screwed everything up like I always did.