Will you still love me?

"And then...black"

Vanoss P.O.V.

I couldn't deal with myself for yelling at Delirious for something that wasn't even fully his fault.
He didn't try to show us off in public
I told him it was fine
He didn't take the pictures and show them all over Twitter
I insisted we go on a date, knowing PDA is involved.

Why did I blame him?
I was just frustrated.
I love him, and everything about him. Even his jealousy. It makes me feel like he actually cares.

I see a sign say 'Airport' and decide I need to figure out if I'm actually going to leave, or if I'm going back.

If I leave, he will get worse, I'll start hating myself and missing him more than ever, and we probably won't be able to fix this.

If I stay I actually have to admit my own mistake, which I hate doing.

'You love him, Evan. You can't just leave. He will forgive you no matter what, you guys were made for each other'

I hear someone say, they aren't wrong.

I pull into a nearby driveway and back out, pulling onto the street to get me back to our house.

---
I didn't even realize I was crying until I pulled into the driveway.
I probably stared at the house crying for 10 minutes until I finally got out with flowers in my hand, yeah, flowers. I just want him to forgive me. I feel empty without him..

Finding the key under the mat, I unlock the door and hear someone moving stuff in the kitchen.
"Jonathan?" I decide to call out
The movement stops, and I hear fast footsteps coming my way.
"EVAN!" He practically screams, running straight to me and jumping in my arms, flinching a bit as he made contact.
I held him there until I got my courage to admit what I did wrong.
I slowly let go of him and place him down, "Jonathan."
He looked at me, "I-I'm sorry."
His face showed confusion, "What? Why? You didn't do anything. It was my fault, I shouldn't have gotten so jealous. I should be sorry, I made you leave. And I knew it wo-"
I interrupt him, "Stop. Blaming. Yourself. Do you hear me? You did nothing wrong, your jealousy wasn't your fault. The fact I said it was okay for us to show our love in public was my fault, you knew it would turn out like this, but I didn't listen. I only blamed it on you, and I'm sorry, Jonathan. I love you more than anything and I even went to get you flowers," I say showing him them, which he smiles and takes, " you make me feel things I tried to shut out. I never wanted you to know I loved you, hell, I never wanted to love anybody. Because even if you felt the same I would fuck it up. And as you can tell, It happens from me becoming overly aggressive."
I finally look straight at him, and he's crying.
"Evan, I don't care about your flaws. I fell in love with you, and you can't just scare me away that easily you idiot." He smiles.
I let out a breath I didn't even notice I was holding, and pull him into my arms again.

But this time, he pulls away, quickly kissing me on the lips, before speaking up.
"Evan. I didn't think you were going to come back."
I raise my eyebrows, not knowing where he's going with this.
He swallows, and puts the flowers down onto the coffee table.
"I blamed myself entirely, and yo- you weren't there to stop the voices." His voice starts to crack a bit.
He mumbles, "I'm sorry."

His hands reach down to the bottom of his shirt and he slowly pulls it up, revealing a new cut, no, carving of the words 'fuck up' into his stomach.

I feel like everything slows down around me, and I can feel myself crying. I hear Jonathan saying my name, but I can't hear him.

My legs give away and I hit the floor and then....black.

-----

Hello dere.
I honestly made myself sad with this one.
How was your guys' Halloween? (If you celebrated it.)
Thank you guys for supporting my story, it means more to me than you think. I also made a new Markimash one that I'll be updating again today if you'd like to check it out (:
-PewdsCryaoticKen