Connections (F1 story)

Chapter Forty Two: London Calls

hope you enjoy, the song really sets the scene :)

Cold, tired and having to deal with a massive headache. That was what the rest of my night consisted of- albeit as soon as I got to the hotel near the airport I fell asleep, immediately. I was physically and emotionally drained. The flight back to the UK was just as bad; I had twenty four hours listening to my thoughts swimming around my head. And a massive credit card bill to now pay off.

Maybe hot footing it back to London wasn't my smartest idea but I could not stand being in that house any longer, especially not when Lauren was there. She was well and truly a vial human being.

There was however a twinge of regret that I hadn't heard the pair of them out, no matter how hard it would have been. These voices were just driving me insane- it was a shame that I couldn't take a breath of fresh air forty thousand feet up. That probably would have helped to clear my head.

He said he loved me, and he said I was different. How could I have been so damn stupid?
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I threw my keys on the kitchen worktop and then immediately sunk down on the couch. My phone had been dead since refuelling at Singapore, but the people who really wanted to get hold of me would could call on the landline. I don't suppose anyone would bother anyway. I'd made a spectacle of myself for starters.

I played back the messages on the answerphone, having several from Sam and several from my parents, not forgetting my cousin. I began to cry again as I heard the worry in their voices. I had a wedding to attend tomorrow- however jet lagged I would be. Mum and Dad would subsequently be at my flat that evening.

I titled my head back letting out another long sigh. I really hated feelings, and I really hated falling for people. I hadn't even begun to think about the next race, and not even once hindering to contact him. I didn't know what to say. Why had I put myself out on a limb so much? I guess I was in a lot of shock.

Tears were trickling down my cheeks and running down my chest onto the material of my top. All the curtains and blinds were shut in my flat so it was incredibly dark, and that only suited my more than subdued mood.

Just how many other girls had overlapped our 'relationship'? If Fleur and Lauren were in the mix then no doubt there'd be half a dozen Grid Girls in there too...who fucking knows.

I sat and pondered more, even though nothing had physically happened between us in Monaco I had spent the whole weekend with him...and for him to say he told Christian straight after. Load of baloney? I think so- or at least in that moment of time I did.

There was one thing though, his face as he realised what I was going on about...and then again when I pulled out my case. Christ,that man was screwing me over...just not how he had been doing forty-eight hours ago. He had a replacement for me now...possibly several, quite easily.

I sighed and sobbed even more as I replayed the scene in the bedroom. Forget that we'd only been together officially for a month and a half. I had fallen for him so many months previous to that. Bloody hell, Saskia, you're so stupid.

I was now fully slumped on the couch, with the TV remote was rather awkwardly digging into my back. I could feel my eyes becoming heavier by the second. Last time I fell asleep on there my back had been knackered for weeks after, and that was when Daniel had first- stop thinking about him...we both needed time and space. Until I was forced to have a meeting with him that was. Perhaps I'd be sacked now.

God I was confused, an emotional wreck in fact. The remainder of my mascara was sprawled all over my face. Very attractive. Where was comfort food when you needed it?