Restoration [Shawn Mendes] AU

Chapter 26

The following Monday at 4:00 in the afternoon, Michelle found herself sitting in a comfortable overstuffed chair, facing Dr. Kane, the therapist she had called the week before for a grief counseling session. She sat in the beautiful Queen Anne Victorian home, taking in the furnishings of his paneled office...the original green tile that covered the surround and hearth of the fireplace in which a warm fire was crackling, the yellow, amber and green leaded glass window directly in her sight line, the beautifully preserved woodwork and built-in bookcases that held hundreds of books. It's not like she could judge how good a therapist Dr. Kane was based on his office decor, but she did feel safe and comfortable sitting there and was hopeful he could help her.  All she needed to do was open up to him and tell him her issues surrounding the deaths of her two loves. She wanted to, but she was nervous. She felt like talking about their deaths in such detail would be like opening a deep wound and watching herself bleed, but she would have to push through if she wanted to move on.

To begin, they spoke of Michelle's interest in old homes and decor as well as her studies in architectural design at RISD. It was a mutual interest they could connect with. From there they talked about a few of her other interests...music, playing piano, vintage bookstores. They also spoke more in depth about her childhood and family. He wanted to make her feel comfortable before coming to the reason she was there...Robert and Beau's deaths.

As they talked for the next 45 minutes about the relationship she had with her late husband and the unexpected death of him and her young son, Dr. Kane said something that really made a lot of sense and gave Michelle some perspective as to why she was having such a difficult time with the loss. It was two-fold...because their deaths came so unexpectedly, she didn't have the luxury of saying goodbye, nor did she even have their bodies to bury after a funeral. There was no gravesite, no ashes. Nothing.

"If you knew your loved one had a terminal illness, all of the things you would want to say to each other would be said and there would be time to prepare for their inevitable death. Of course it's painful no matter when a loved one dies, but when dealing with a sudden death, it's much different from dealing with a death caused by an illness," Dr. Kane explained. It was so spot on, she didn't know why the thought never occurred to her before.

Her session with Dr. Kane was very insightful and she decided to make another appointment for the following Monday afternoon. It couldn't hurt, especially when her wedding anniversary was on the exact same day, ironically. Her first anniversary without Robert was going to be difficult and she'd need all the help she could get.

                                                                             ~~~~~

Shawn and Michelle continued to work on their collaboration with David and would meet at least twice a week and sometimes more as the deadline got closer. The final project had to be ready for group critiques during the last week of winter session in early February, which meant they had about 4 more weeks to get it completed.