Finding Ms. Right

Chapter 61: Old Self

JANA

"SALAMAT Manong Sic." Sabi ko matapos niyang ilagay ang mga gamit ko sa likod ng kotse.

Ngumiti lang siya at pumasok na kami sa kotse. Pinaandar kaagad ni Manong Sic ang kotse pagkaupo ni Yaya sa tabi ko dito sa backseat. "Sigurado ka ba talagang ayos ka na, Jana?" Worry was evident in her voice so I laughed a little bit.

"Oo naman po." Sagot ko habang nakangiti.

"Haynako, Linda." Napapailing na sabi ni Manong Sic and I laughed. Umirap lang si Yaya Linda at ngumiti sa akin ng nabaling sa akin ang tingin niya.

Tipid lang akong ngumiti. I looked outside the window. I only stayed at the hospital for four days but it felt like years. Feeling ko madaming nagbago. Feeling ko... pati ako nagbago.

While I am staying at the hospital, hindi ako tumanggap ng mga bisita. Only Yaya Linda, Manong Sic and my doctor are allowed to enter my room. Dahil nasa VIP room naman ako, madali lang nilang nahaharang ang kahit na sinong bibisita. I banned visitors and Lucy is no exception to that. I just want to be alone. Madalas nga ay ako pa mismo ang nakikiusap kay Yaya na iwan ako. And I also heard na gustong bumisita nila Darren but I didn't let them. What's the sense of visiting me after leaving me? Pakyu sila.

Sa sobrang dami ng iniisip ko, hindi ko namalayang nandito na pala kami sa harap ng bahay namin. We went out of the car at inalalayan pa ako ni Yaya dahil baka daw madapa ako. I just laughed it off. Ang laki ko na kaya.

Pinauna nila ako kaya pumasok na ako sa gate. Gusto ko pa nga silang tulungan pero ayaw nila. But I frowned when I saw that the gate is open. Sinong tao dito sa bahay kung kasama naman namin si Yaya?

I went inside and my question was immediately answered.

"Hello, anak." Nakangiti sa akin si Papa habang nakatayo sa harap ng pintuan. It was like he's already expecting for us to come.

I didn't smile back. "Hi, 'pa." I greeted him but I never smiled. We stared at each other. Him, smiling. Me, serious. The wounds are still fresh. I can't forget about it in just a short period of time.

"How are you, my princess?" Tanong niya. His smile didn't fade even for a second.

"Pa? Sinon-" Lumabas mula sa pintuan si Kuya John. Hindi na ako nagulat. I'm also expecting Kuya Jake to come out and he did. Ngumiti ang mga Kuya ko sa akin but I didn't smiled back.

"Baby! How are you? Are you feeling okay now?" Masiglang tanong ni Kuya Jake. He was about to come near me but Kuya John held his hand. Napatingin ako sa kamay nila and I laughed a bit. I know they knew.

"Of course, Kuya. I'm fine because luckily, I remembered everything." I said and their smiles immediately faded.

"A-ano?" Kunot noong tanong ni Kuya John. Pumasok sa gate sila Yaya at Manong Sic. Pero natigilan sila ng makita sila Papa. Manong Sic was about to greet them but Yaya pulled him. Lumabas sila kaagad ng gate pero tumingin muna sa akin saglit si Yaya at sa mukha pa lang niya, alam kong nag-aalala siya.

Nang makalabas sila, tumingin ako sa pamilya ko. "Anak..." Lalapit dapat si Papa but I raised my hand so he stopped. Naglakad ako palapit sa kanila. Kuya Jake and Papa's expression are worried while Kuya John is serious. Tumigil ako ng ilang metro na lang ang layo namin sa isa't isa.

"I don't know why you need to hide everything. I don't know why you need to make me believe a lie. I don't know why you need to lie." Sambit ko. I felt my tears but I held it back. Ayokong umiyak. Not now, not again.

"We only did that for you." Kuya John said firmly. Napangiti ako.

"But lying for someone's sake will only destroy them at the end. And now, I'm broken." Natigilan sila at nag-iwas ng tingin si Kuya John. "But I'm not mad at you. Hindi masama ang loob ko. Because like what you said Kuya, you all did that for me. I won't be angry. Just give me a little space for now. I need to breathe. I need to think. I badly need a break in order to fix my heart." Sabi ko. Bago pa ako maiyak, nilagpasan ko na sila at pumasok ako sa loob ng bahay. Tears immediately fell down.