Ruin my life (Gustav åhr)

thirty five

''Gus!'' I cried out through my phone, i was drunk and sad, i missed him more than i missed anything else, ''laury..? You doing okay?'' Gus' voice immediately caused me to smile, it was soft and deep at the same time, i just wanted to hold him. ''I'm not Gustav, i need you..'' I cried into he phone and he sighed, ''You're drunk aren't you?'' I rolled my eyes, ''Where are you?'' i asked as i stared around Jake's room looking for car keys, ''My place in L.A, don't come by Lauren, i'd rather see we see each other sober, stay where you are...okay? Let's meet up tomorrow.'' He offered and i smiled, ''sounds good, text me. Can we keep talking though?'' i asked, it sounded loud through the phone, like he was at a party or something, i was curious as to what he was doing, ''Yes of course we can.'' I heard him move around, ''what're you doing?'' i questioned him, ''I'm in my room listening to music, smoking.'' He replied, ''What about your drunk ass?'' ''Honestly i'm in Jake's room missing you, they're having a party and well i got drunk...'' i chuckled, he chuckled with me, '' i miss hearing you laugh..'' I smiled widely hearing his words, ''i'm surprised you're not with Colby right about now though...'' I heard the salt in his tongue it was bitter and i rolled my eyes, ''He's got a girl friend Gus.'' ''Like that would stop the two of you..'' He wasn't wrong though. ''We're not together Gus, i'm a free woman, but next topic, i applied at the airline here, LAX, hopefully they answer soon..'' ''That's really good Laury, i'm so glad you're getting yourself figured out, it's so good to hear...'' He said happily. I spread myself out on Jake's bed, stretching out, i wished Gus was laying here with me. ''I miss laying with you.'' I spoke aloud and he chuckled, ''Lauren trust me, i wish you were here with me...'' ''So let me come over.'' I pleaded, he sighed through the phone. ''Call a cab.'' He hung up.

''21.45'' I paid the taxi man and then ran to Gus' front door, i awaited for it to open then it suddenly did, he stared at me with a bright smile, i leaned in kissing him passionately, he held onto my hips. I pulled away and put my forehead on his, ''Gus you're all i want, all i need, i just wanna move forward with you, become the best versions of ourselves, i can't stay away from you any longer...'' I shut my eyes tightly as he pulled me in shutting the door, picking me up, he held me in his arms, he carried me out to his bedroom throwing me on his bed, ''Okay but i have questions...'' He sighed sitting beside me, i sat and waited for the burning questions. ''Have you hooked up with Colby since we broke up?'' ouch, i sighed, ''Yeah i have..'' He sighed and pushed his hair out of his face, ''of course you have, OhH cOlBy GiVe IT tO mE GoOd.'' He laughed to himself, ''What happened to his girl friend?'' ''She's around, it just happened after you came to see me, i felt overwhelmed, i didn't know what to do and i got emotional, it's stupid.'' I was astonished by my impulsive decision, ''Right so now you kinda get the feeling?'' He gave me a soft look and i nodded agreeing. We both sat in silence now, unsure of what to say, "So...what are we gonna do about us..?" Gus finally spoke, i looked up at him and bit my lip,
"Let's just, have fun Gus." I turned towards him,
"Unofficially?" He asked, i shook my head,
"No lets be together, lets do it, and let's not fuck up this time, please, let's finally get the story we were supposed to have, no cheating, no rape, no drugs and shit, let's just be our best selves." He smiled softly and chuckled, "I'll try my hardest for you Laury." He reached over to my hand and i scoffed,
"You'll try?" "Lauren I believe i can be good for you, and im sorry i've been causing you havoc." I held his hand and sighed, "I've been causing you havoc too Gus. It takes two to ruin a relationship." I leaned in and hugged him, he smelt like cigarettes and weed. I smiled and pulled away, pressing my lips against his. He kissed me back as he ran his fingers through my hair, I pulled away with a smile, he smiled revealing his grill, "Lauren i love you more than i love music, you're my entire life, i'd give it up for you.." He held my face softly, "Well good thing you'll never have to do that.." I laid down on his chest as he played with my hair, "You're my everything.." He kissed my head, "Don't leave me again.."