Her Wolf ~Book 1~ [Hiccelsa]

26. The Forbidden Choice

DAYS LATER

"Your rib is cracked." Hiccup told me calmly while doing another test. "But there are no splinters, you haven't punctured anything," he paused for a moment, struggling to say the last bet of his sentence. "... Yet."

I couldn't say anything to him. For the first time, he has left me speechless. I forced myself to look up at him, afraid his gaze would hold nothing but anger. They didn't. Hiccup's eyes held fear. The anger was gone at this point, and all I could see was fear. For the first time ever, I saw fear in the Wolf's eyes. 

"Don't you understand yet?" He spoke up again. "It's breaking your bones now, Elsa. Crushing them like paper," He said to me. "It's crushing you from the inside out. It's killing you faster than I can cure you,"

We stay silent for a moment. I still couldn't say anything to him, and I knew he had more to say to me. He always does. "The fetus isn't compatible with your body." He told me suddenly, his hand rested on a small blood bag, with my blood.

"It's too strong for you to keep carrying it." He said, his hand moving to another needle. "At the rate it's is growing, it won't allow you to get the nutrition you need." He added.

Finally, I was able to speak, as if he had mentally told me he stopped. Though I had so many questions for him, I could only ask, "What does that mean?"

He turned to me before his eyes fell to my stomach "It's starving you by the hour. I can't stop it, and l can't slow it down." He said. I don't reply, and let him talk. "At this rate, your heart will give out before you can deliver." He finished.

I had to sit there and act strong for his sake. I had to prove to him that I wasn't scared of what he's telling me. As much as I think I am convincing, Hiccup Haddock knows better. He knows I'm terrified.  Everything he is telling me is scaring me. I know he isn't telling me this to scare. He wants me to be aware of what is happening to my body. "Then I'll hold on as long as l can, and then..." I say to him, acting as if my voice wasn't cracking.

"Elsa." He cut me off. "Listen to me, Love... There are some conditions that even my blood or venom can't overcome." He said. "As much as I know I can save this child, I can guarantee you'd survive and I've decided I'm not okay with that."

Holding back the tears, and all the fear I have, I look at him. Still, I could see the confused and hurt look in his eyes. "I'm sorry," I say. "Hiccup, I'm sorry."

"Do you understand, I can't live without you." He said, looking from the trees out the window to me.

"You won't," I say. "You won't live without me, ever. "You're gonna have a part of me, whether I live or not. They'll need you."

He took a sharp breath, his gaze going wolf-like as he narrowed his eyes, fighting the urge to explode on me. "Elsa, do you honestly think that I could love it or even tolerate it if it killed you?" He asked me.

"It's not its fault." I start. "You have to accept what is. Why can you just understand that?"

"Because you've given me no damn choice!" He suddenly raised his voice, a snarl threatening his voice as he turned to me, his eyes narrowed murderously. "I could've helped you," he started, calmly. "I could've gotten rid of this thing and you could live." He said to me pausing as he looked away from me, refusing to even look at me. "But, you decided this on your own. You've decided to leave me."

I fought the tears as he finally turned around again. I'm not even upset that he got mad at me. I'm not upset that he yelled. I'm upset because of the agony he's in. The pain and agony I'm putting him through because I told him I wanted to keep the baby that he's convinced is another demon like him. Seeing him upset to the point of anger, is one thing I hate seeing. But, I know at the end of the day, it is my fault. It is my decision that caused this.  Still, I'm seeing this pregnancy through to the end.