BDSM SOCIETY: Convicted To You

Start

Had you ever loved someone, kept someone, and hold someone that was not yours to begin with? Would you ever let go of someone that was not yours in the first place?

Millions of questions. But answers were meant for those who seek it.

I submerged on the water and swooped back and forth until I got tired of swimming. Kung ako ang papipiliin, mas gusto kong huwag sabihin ang iniisip at nararamdaman ko. Kaya nga, sinasabihan ako ng mga kaibigan kong mamamatay akong puno ng sama ng loob. Isa akong farmer na walang lupain.

"Ma'am, nasa loob po si Sir Hashim," imporma ng kasambahay namin.

Shet!

"I'll be there." I mounted from the pool and covered myself with the see-through robe. I drank my last shot of whiskey before striding inside the house.

Mula rito sa babasaging pintuan ay kitang-kita ko siyang nakaupo sa sofa. No matter how luxurious the sofa was, he's still strikingly handsome sitting there. Shet! Mahihiya ang mamahaling upuan kapag siya ang uupo. He was beyond...human.

It was already given that falling in love was unintentional. Loving someone was easy to feel. There were different kinds of love. Variant definition. But one feeling.

Love.

Shet!

Could you ever define that? Was there such a meaning to begin with? How could love be easy to hold but hard to let go? Ang dali magdesisyong mahalin ang isang tao, ngunit mahirap magdesisyon na i-let go.

When butterflies in your stomach changed into knives stabbing your heart countlessly; thumping heartbeat like that of a sensuous hoof turned into heart shattered into pieces like that of glass fell on the floor. And euphoria faded into dysphoria.

Nang tuluyan ko siyang lapitan ay halos mahipnotismo ako sa sobrang kisig niya. Shet! Ganoon pa rin ang effect niya sakin. He's ruthless looking. And I loved that very kind of him. Busy siya sa pagtipa ng kung ano sa cellphone niya kaya naman ay libre ko siyang natititigan sa malapitan. I missed that skin disheveled on his forehead. Those black thick brows. His pulsating jaw and lips clasped into a line. Shet, ang sarap!

Our gazes met when he lifted his hooded brown bored eyes to envisage me. Just like before, I concealed my true feelings with a gleeful smile.

Taguan ng feelings. Shet!

"Hi, you're here," I said a matter of factly.

"I heard you came home." I bit my lips hearing his deep baritone voice. Another shet! That's the very thing where my mania of him rooted. Sa boses niya nagsimula ang lahat. Deep baritone voice and everything in my system chaotically dysfunctioned. Nilibot niya ang paningin sa bahay. His eyes were searching for someone. And I was clearly aware who. "Where are they?"

I smiled and shrugged my shoulder. "They're not here, obviously." I sat down adjacent to him and layered my left leg over the right one. Maiksi ang length ng roba ko kaya naman ay lumabas ang balat ng aking hita. I liked it this way. I intended to wear this kind of robe because I knew he would come. "May lakad ka?" I asked when I noticed him checking his watch.

"Yeah. We'll be rendering in Saint Magdalene tonight."

"Yeah, it's the talk of the campus for about two weeks." Bago pa dumating ang February 15, kalat na sa buong campus na tutugtog sila mamayang gabi para sa junior's night. Tapos na ang Passion Night ng mga seniors kagabi. "Your career is on the blooming state now." I couldn't help but be proud. Dati ay sa cafe lang sila tumutugtog. Ngayon ay may mga guesting na sila. I was there when they're starting and I witnessed and been believing that they'd be on the spotlight not very soon.