Raw [Vkook]

107: Grieving

Spring Day - BTS

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There's different ways people deal with grief.

Many may fall into the horrid temptation of agony; cry and scream all they'd like until the pain is less unbearable.

Others talk it out, mourning to their loved ones of the last memory they can think of with the perished person.

Plenty just want to be alone.

For Taehyung, he dealt it with drugs.

With Yeosang, he became silent.

And for Jungkook...... Denial.

Complete and utter denial.

Just the way he would go on about his day, as though nothing has happened with his beaming smile, felt like a million shards of glass is being stabbed straight into Taehyung's soul.

Taehyung knows Jungkook shouldn't be like this; Tormenting himself this way from the truth, but he does.

And he can't seem to stop.

Jungkook calls Woosung.... Every single passing day. Assuring himself when the other lines goes straight to voicemail that he's just busy or out and can't hear his phone, just anything besides the fact that..... He's not around anymore.

Taehyung was careful yet ready. He was ready for when Jungkook explodes his emotions in the stage of acceptance, letting everything out in the open as he completely loses his mind.

As for now Taehyung tries to go along with it. He lets Jungkook fuck him whenever he pleases, at any time he wishes, ignoring his whimpers against his ear in the midst of it just to not press his buttons. Taehyung would cook every day for him just so he can know he's there for him or they would watch movies and Taehyung would purposely make them have a character death, just to help him in some way break from this visage.

He doesn't.

He never breaks.

This is just so damaging for his mental health.

It's only going to hurt him more the farther he pushes this to the back of his head.

The only way Taehyung knows that Jungkook is somewhat intact to what's going on is or is mentally aware is by how he hasn't opened Woosung's voicemail yet.

The last one he sent.

He refused to open it, nor saying as to why.

Than he would brush it aside as though it's nothing.

From time to time Taehyung would also check up on Yeosang while Jimin was in class, since he wouldn't leave the room, but the younger wouldn't speak. He would lay on his bed, stare at the ceiling with lifeless eyes but never say anything.

Even to Jimin.

If he speaks, he'll explode. That much Taehyung can tell.

He doesn't want to explode because then it'll make it too real.

So you see, many people deal with grief in various ways, but in order to keep going with this grief is by accepting what happened in order to make it a little less painful.

Even if it only feels heavier within time.

Shit, Taehyung still hasn't fully recovered with the emptiness his mother left in his heart.

"Little cub, I still haven't showed you my Valentine's Day present! Come on, I want to show it to you," Jungkook suddenly whines besides Taehyung, who is holding him in his arms, "Can I show it to you now?"