Chapter 20: The Claws of Doubt ✓

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"O-Oh my god

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"O-Oh my god." I felt the grip of panic seizing my throat, my eyes burned. "I- please I-"

"Calm down, deep breaths, look at me." Asher said soothingly.

"I-I can't. My eye." I yelled at him. "I'm gonna lose my eye." I could feel it.

"Your eye? Iris please explain to me what's happening." His voice was distant to my ears.

"I-it's stuck at the back of my eyeball, I'm gonna lose my eye." Tears escape my firmly shut eyes. I hear his voice again but words keep pouring out of my mouth. "A-and I'm lonely because I'm keeping anyone that dares approach at arm's length, I'm not willing to tell Sam about my feelings and I just rejected Chris and I'm a mess." A sob works it's way up my throat. "And now I'm pretty much drunk and I'm going to lose to eye." My shoulders shook.

"For God's sake Ris! Tell me what's fucking wrong with your eye!" He yelled, his sharp voice startling me into opening an eye. His worried expression filled me with guilt. He must think I'm crazy. I lower my open eye still clutching the other one, I was crazy.

"My contact lens is stuck at the back of my eye." I murmur, the thought filling me with dread again.

"Come here." I inch closer to him. He grabs my jaw so I don't move, then raises his finger to my closed eye. "Stop squirming." His voice was firm, like a parent to his child. Another wave of shame washes over me making my face hot. I close the other eye.

He rubs circles on the top of eyelid slowly for several moments, I feel his breath fanning my face, he smells of peaches.

"Why do you smell like peaches?" As soon as I utter the words he shushed me.

"Open your eyes." I slowly open my watery eyes. My lens was no longer stuck and he moved his finger to adjust it.

"I'm not letting you poke my eye." I slapped my finger away. "I fucking hate contacts."

He was still close when I looked up, the corner of his mouth twitching. I turn away, putting distance between us, hiding my face with my hands. I wish an earthquake would open the earth and swallow me right at the moment, or a lightning would strike me so I could disappear. I was dying of embarrassment.

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