Partners-Five Hargreeves

Um, ex-fucking-scuse me?

"Well, this is not good."

"Really? 'Cause I think we are doing fabulous," I remark sarcastically to my partner as we walk down the stairs of our failed attempt.

"I was pretty good, though, right? 'Yeah. What about my consent, bitch?'" Klaus chuckles maniacally.

"Klaus," Five yells in frustration, "it doesn't matter."

"What? What? What's the big deal with this eye, anyway?"

Five steps threateningly towards Klaus, "There is someone out there who's going to lose an eye in the next seven days. They're going to bring about the end of life on this earth as we know it." I touch Five's arm telling him to back down and he walks away.

"Yeah, can I get that 20 bucks, like, now, or what?" Is he serious?

I sigh, "Klaus now is not the time."

"Your 20 bucks?"

"Yeah, my 20 bucks." How many times are we gonna say 20 bucks?

"The apocalypse is coming," oh great no more 20 bucks, "and all you can think about is getting high?"

"Well, I'm also quite hungry. Tummies a-rumblin'." Klaus imitates a stomach growling and I try very hard not to laugh to not upset Five worse. He can be very moody even when he doesn't have teenage hormones running through him.

"You're useless," he says quietly. "You're all useless." I scoff, Um, ex-fucking-scuse me?

"Come on. You need to lighten up, old man."

"Yeah, no shit," I say glaring at Five as he sits down. He looks over at me with a confused look. Oh, do you not remember just saying that I was useless too, you little shit? 'What are you so pissy about?' he mouths at me, almost aggravated. I just roll my eyes in response.

"Hey, you know," Klaus says turning to Five on the stairs, "I've just realized why you're so uptight. You must be horny as hell."

"I'm out," I say quietly while walking away towards a bench.

"All those years by yourself. It's gotta screw with your head, being alone," I hear Klaus say distantly.

"Well...I wasn't alone." I roll my eyes.

"Oh? Pray tell."

"Her name was Delores." Yes, the plastic mannequin that he talks to. Did he fail to mention that? "We were together for over 30 years."

"Thirty years? Oh, wow," Klaus chuckles. "The longest I've been with someone was...I don't know three weeks. And that's only because I was so tired of looking for a place to sleep."

Within the span of 10 seconds, Five is in front of me, grabs my hand, and then we are in the back seat of a taxi.

"Don't stop. Just keep going," he tells the startled driver. As we pass Klaus, he rolls down the window and gives him a salute.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, what about my money?" Klaus yells at us.

Five ignores his shouting brother outside, "What is wrong with you?"

"Hmm? What do you mean?" I ask innocently, still not looking over at him.

"You seem mad."

I scoff again, "Oh, really now? You must be an absolute genius to figure that one out."

"Okay," he scoffs back, "cut the shit. What's wrong?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe it's the 'you're all useless' line. Or maybe it was the way you snapped at me and asked what I was so 'pissy' about. Just a quick thought. Or!" I say in exaggerated excitement, "Or maybe it's just that you've had your usual shitty attitude times 10 since we've gotten here. Yeah, those first one's kind of stacks on to that one."

"You know I didn't mean you when I said that," he says in an exasperated tone.

"Which part? 'Cause you said a hell of a lot." He gave me a look. "Ohhh, you mean the useless part. Well, it certainly didn't seem like you were excluding me there. It only sounded like you were excluding yourself in that one, buddy." Okay, I will admit that I'm being a little petty. But I sure as hell need to fix this attitude problem right here, right now, cause I'm not dealing with this for the rest of this trip.

"Okay, fine," he says, turning to fully face me. "Ava, I didn't mean you when I said that everyone was useless. You have helped me since even before I even accepted your help and have always taken care of my ass no matter what. And as for my boost in hostility, I had forgotten how aggravating my siblings can be." I give him a pointed look. "Fine. I'm not exactly comfortable being back home. It brings back bad memories and I don't know if I'm ready to relive those memories and fight an apocalypse all at once."

"See, now that was the heartfelt answer I was looking for. Was it that hard? Don't you feel better already?" I ask smugly.

Five half-heartedly glares at me, "No, I actually feel like jumping out of the car now."

"All joking aside," I say looking him dead in the eyes, "we are going to get through this. All of it. We are going to figure out how to solve the apocalypse and save the world. We will save your family. And like you said, we will figure out everything else later. I promise. Okay?"

He looks back into my eyes for a while before nodding and smiling at me. "Okay. Now, let's get shit done."