Melodies Of Pain

MELODY 38: Who's Voice

Chapter 38

Malalaman mo lang talaga kapag malakas sa'yo ang isang tao o isang bagay dahil kapag nawala ito sa'yo ay parang kalahati ng pagkatao mo ay naiwala mo rin. I always value friendship the most more than anything. I treasure every memory that I made with them. Every seconds of laughter, the tears that dropped because of how happy we are together is priceless.

They were there when no one else does and I feel sorry about not knowing what's going on with them. Hindi ko alam na 'yon ang naiisip nila, na kaya nawawalan ako ng oras sa kanila ay dahil ipinagpalit ko na sila sa mga sikat na tao.

But I never did that.

Tatlong araw na simula ng magkasagutan kami ng mga kaibigan ko sa hospital. I was so outminded and I don't feel like talking to anyone, going outside, eating or even washing my self. I feel so dry dead.

Before I locked myself inside my unit, I payed some people to clean Lian's messed at her dorm the day after that accident. I told my manager that I can't work in a week and to cancel the work I had with Qwuin. I secretly contact Mady's mother and dropped money on her account without her knowing.

That's the least I can do and even if I want to talk to them, they won't let me in.

Sa loob ng tatlong araw ay nakahiga lang ako sa kama hanggang sa mabasa ang buong unan ko dahil sa mga luha. I came up with a thought that maybe I was not a good friend to them. I always had their favors every time and I don't know if I did a favor for them. Wala akong ideya kung anong klaseng kaibigan ba ako.

Ayoko sanang bumangon mula sa kama ko ngunit nakarinig ako ng malakas na kalabog sa labas ng kwarto kaya pinilit ko ang sarili ko na tumayo para tignan kung ano ang nangyari.

I was about to go out of my room when someone opened the door and showed me a man figured. The lights are off and when I heard a clicking of switch, I saw Russel's worried face infront of me.

"Jesus! Thanks you are fine!" mabilis siyang naglakad papunta sa'kin at niyakap ako ng mahigpit. He broke the hug and searched for my face. "Why did you locked yourself here and your eyes...are swollen so bad! Jia anong nangyari?"

Umiling lang ako at sinubsob ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya at humagulhol na lamang. Ayokong magsalita at gusto kong iiyak na lamang lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman ko.

"Russel and I tried to contact you but your phone is off and your manager told us what you did." I heard a familiar voice from behind walking on our spot.

Mas lalo lang akong umiyak at lumipat ng yakap sa kaniya. "Coach..."

Ilang sandali lang ay nagpunta kami sa sala para makapag-usap ng maayos. May dala silang pagkain kaya 'yon ang kinain namin.

They started to fire me some questions and every time I spit every word and remember every scenario at what exactly happened, the familiar pain started to grip my heart.

Nakaabala pa pala ako kay Russel dahil galing pa sila sa Laguna pero umuwi siya rito ng malaman ang balita tungkol sa'kin.

"Kumakain ka ba ng maayos habang wala ako?" tanong ni Russel sa tabi ko habang minimix niya ang ramen.

"Ewan ko," I shrugged. "Nakalimutan ko na nga ata paano kumain."

"Jia hindi naman pwedeng ganito ka na lang palagi. May mga naghihintay din naman sa'yong mga tao." Coach Eva reached for my hand. "Please, don't do this to yourself. Kung magiging ganito ka at hindi ka gagawa ng paraan para maayos kayong magkakaibigan ay tuluyan talaga kayong masisira."