enemies (with benefits) » l.r.h || completed

thirty one

Michael

"So, you haven't heard from Vanessa?" Mom asked, making herself a cup of coffee. I shook my head, playing with my cereal. Saturday mornings were usually my favorite things because I'd still be sleeping, but apparently not this Saturday morning. It was the perfect weather for sleep: beautiful, sunny, but cold as fuck.

Ever since Vanessa cut off all ties with me, I felt so bitter that I couldn't even sleep. I had been up since three in the morning and I still just wasn't tired. I tried playing video games, I tried drinking, I tried going out (but then I remember I hate going outside then turn right back around to my bedroom), and nothing works.

Not to sound like a girl, but I can't seem to function without Vanessa in my life. It's my own fault though. I convinced her into it all, I deserve to be without her.

"Have you tried contacting her?" Mom sipped her coffee, raising her eyebrows at me.

"No, Mom," I started, sarcasm raging. "I never thought of texting her and finding out why she won't speak to me."

"Whoa," her eyebrows knit together and she set her mug down. "watch your tone. You may be 19, but I can still take you down." I sighed, shaking my head and staring into the milk. As if that will solve all of my problems.

"She said she needed someone," my voice cracked; whether from the morning or from the sudden burst of tears I felt overwhelming me, I'm not sure. "I thought that I was the someone she needed." I wiped my nose and hugged the pillow I had brung down with me.

"I'm sorry, honey," Mom said softly, making her way across the table and hugging my head against her stomach as she tried to soothe me. As much as I loved my mom, a hug from her wasn't going to help. (Well, it helped a little, but that's beside the point.)

"I wish she'd at least just be my friend again," I muttered, rubbing my eye.

"You guys were really starting to get close again," she mumbled, gazing out the window. "I'm just as shocked as you are." She rubbed my back and continued hugging me; and, I have to admit, it helped a lot more than I thought it would.

"You have no idea," I muttered under my breath, burying my face in my pillow. I wanted to sleep. I needed to sleep. I haven't had a full eight hours of sleep for a week. I don't know how I'm even coming up with coherent thoughts and sentences.

"Michael, honey, you need to take a shower at least," Mom pulled away and looked down at me. "don't let this get to you like it is." She pushed my hair back and looked at my (probably) red and puffy eyes. "When was the last time you got some sleep?" I shrugged, my eyelids heavy but unable to shut completely.

"I haven't been able to," I sighed, looking up at my mother's terribly concerned expression.

"You really liked her, didn't you?" I nodded, biting hard on my lip to stop from crying. I felt like I was being a stupid little child, but she really meant something to me. And to be cut off with just a "we can't be friends anymore"? I don't get it. I would've appreciated an explanation.

It could've been that her best friend's boyfriend's sister's gold fish was dying for all I care. It's better than just being left to hang with the rope I tied myself.

"Michael?"

"Hmm?" Mom handed me my jeans and a shirt.

"I told you to go shower. I'm making you go shopping with me."

"I wore this yesterday," I said, looking at the shirt.

"You've been in the house, no one you know is going to see you," she ruffled my hair as she walked up the stairs and I shook my head, taking the clothes and pillow upstairs with me.

I walked into my room and I immediately spot something unordinary under my bed that I haven't noticed before. I lean down and pull it out and look at it. A t-shirt. My favorite white t-shirt. That has been missing for about three months.

I furrowed my eyebrows, thinking back to three months ago and when I had last worn this shirt. "I was with Vanessa the last time I wore it." I recalled under my breath. I wanted to wear it, so I went back downstairs to the laundry room, still thinking back to how I had lost it.

We went out and got a bunch of snacks, like Red Bull and Doritos and shit like that. We were gonna have a movie day; all day long just shitty movies we pick out and make each other watch.

That turned into a make out session that eventually lead to all of our clothes coming off then it lead to us having sex as quietly as possible because my mom had company over.

After that, she went to the bathroom, then came back out in that t-shirt and underwear. But she took it off before leaving my house the next morning. . .

I put the shirt in the wash by itself and started it, leaning against the machine.

"What are you doing?" I ask, watching her bend down under my bed.

"I thought I dropped something," she smiles up at me. Vanessa stands back up and fixes her hair before crawling on top of me.

"Did you?" I smile, putting my hands on her hips. I love seeing her face above mine.

"Nope," she leans down and kisses me. It's bittersweet, because she's leaving me to be with Luke. I am getting sick of this, but she doesn't know how to break up with him. "I gotta go." She whispers, carefully crawling off of me.

"Do you have to?" I whine jokingly, propping up on my elbow as I watch her leave.

"Unfortunately," she gives a small smile. "I'll be back soon though."

"I miss you already!" I say dramatically, falling on my back on the bed. I sigh loudly, to add more emphasis. She giggles, hand on the doorknob.

"I'll be back, I promise."

She never came back. She just texted me a few days later saying she couldn't see me anymore. But, as I played back the memory, I realized that little shit hid my shirt under the bed so she could wear it the next time she wanted to come over.

I smiled way too big. It was adorable that she hid clothes so she could wear them. God, I miss her.

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Twitter: @lukesenemies